The Cullens' Computer

Written By:TimelessParodies
You can read the original here:
All credit goes to the original author

It was a dark and stormy night... Alice Cullen was sitting on the Cullen's front porch, staring at the rain falling down all around her. A fork of lightning flashed, and she sighed. She was bored. Jasper, Emmett, Edward, and Carlisle were all out hunting. Bella was away somewhere, cooing at Renesmee, and Rosalie and Esme were buying groceries. Ever since Jacob had started visiting regularly, there'd been a strong nessecity to buy food... and air freshner. There was nothing to do, really. Being a vampire got so dull... There was another clap of thunder. Alice stared up at the sky, having had a sudden, and violent wish to fly.

"If only vampires could really turn into bats..." she grumbled. There was nothing to foresee, nothing to do. Life had fallen into a dull peace. The worst kind of dull peace there was. Every day they measured Nessie, perhaps went to see Charlie, bantered a bit with Jacob, tormented Jasper, and tried unsucessfully to make Bella wear something she'd picked out. It was a monotonous routine, and one that she wanted desperately to break... but how? Get the whole family to participate in a skit? ... Not likely. Simply kiss Jasper for a while? ... He was hunting. Play... Truth or Dare? Before she could get excited, however, she remembered the last time they'd so unwisely chosen to play.

"ALICE! Truth or Dare!?" Rosalie hissed. She stiffened, a wide smile playing across her face.

"Dare." She said fearlessly.

"I dare you to... burn all the clothing that you've purchased in the past three days." Alice gaped at her, hatred suddenly pounding through her veins...

Alice grimaced, and shuddered at the memory of the ashes coating her skin. Why not give Bella a makeover? No... That involved too much begging and pleading, since she couldn't force her to sit still now that she was a vampire... She didn't need one anymore, anyway... Repaint the living room? Terrorize the nearby squirrels? Ooh! Try uselessly to talk to Leah Clearwater!? She sighed again, as the pointless possibilities flowed through her mind like a river. The werewolves should be asleep right now, anyway... Edward. What was he doing? Esme? Maybe she should repaint the living room... It began raining harder, droplets bouncing onto her as they rebounded off the porch steps. Alice sighed yet again. She didn't want to have to wash this... might as well go inside.

Stepping into the house, a flash of blue light caught her eye. She turned to look at the source- a light green laptop, sitting there, abandoned, on the kitchen counter... She grinned abruptly, and threw herself onto the couch, grabbing the laptop on the way.

A dim light filled the Cullen's first floor as she opened it. Her hands hovered over the keyboard, unsure of what to type... a password was required. This was Edward's computer. Alice furrowed her brow, trying to concentrate... she closed her eyes... a hazy vision played behind her eyelids. Edward sitting here, pressing... VampireFrogsLoveNessie. She opened her eyes, slightly taken aback. What the hell was that about? She shrugged. It didn't matter anyway, so she typed in the password. The first thing that came up was a link to a classical music website. She chuckled, and looked at the internet homepage. A link to... instant messaging? She clicked on it quickly.

Log-In... she needed a password again. Instead of wasting effort, she simply made a new account with a flourish.

TinkerBella

Wait... TinkerBella? The A was meant for Alice, but now it looked like Bella's account... she erased it.

PixieGirl

That was better... Or should it be PixieLady? Nah... that sounded too old. She was only seventeen, technically. She logged on, and carefully scrolled through random conversations until one caught her eye...

Moony: No, seriously, though. I really DO think I should!

Murky: Ew... No. No matter how many times you tell me that you're 'male-model' material, I'm still going to say the same thing, Jacob!

Moony: But Leah! It's TRUE. You've seen me before, admit it.

Murky: I know I have, and I keep trying to forget about it... JACOB. Step away from the shovel. Get AWAY! AUGH! CRAZY WOLF WITH A SHOVEL! CRAZY WOLF WITH A SHOVEL!

Moony: You've earned this! TAKE IT LIKE A MAN!

Murky: I'M NOT A MAN, DAMMIT!

Moony: MWAHAHAHAHA!

PixieGirl: Oi... you wolves ARE weird...

Moony: ...

Murky: ...

Moony: PixieGirl... a Cullen, right?

PixieGirl: Yes, a Cullen...

Murky: The only one who could be a pixie is the shrimpy one. What's-Her-Name.

PixieGirl: Excuse me?

Moony: Alice, isn't it?

PixieGirl: Yes. Thank you for troubling to remember my name when you visit my home every day.

Moony: Why have you joined us today, Dear Little Friend? You're not normally on here, even though everyone else is...

PixieGirl: ?

Murky: It's not that hard, leech... the rest of the Cullens all have accounts... not that they're on my normal contacts, but...

Moony: Now, now, let's not be too... rude, Leah, dearest.

Murky: Shut up.

PixieGirl: Where do YOUR names come from anyway!? I mean... Murky!? Moony!? What the heck is THAT supposed to mean!?

Moony: Now, now... don't lose your temper on us, Alice Cullen.

Murky: Like... the opposite of CLEAR. Murky. Like... Clearwater, you know?

Moony: I'm just desperately in love with Remus Lupin.

PixieGirl: ... What, from Harry Potter?

Moony: Yes.

PixieGirl: ... You strange, strange little boy...

TheFriendlyGhost: Alice!?

PixieGirl: Yes? And who are YOU?

TheFriendlyGhost: What are you doing here!?

PixieGirl: Curing my boredom as... wait... if you're Casper... JASPER! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!? I thought you were hunting!

TheFriendlyGhost: We, um, stopped to... rest at Tanya's place in Denali.

PixieGirl: ... And you... DIDN'T invite me!?

TheFriendlyGhost: Edward wouldn't let me!

PixieGirl: Edward's there too? Oh, well, I guess I'll just go on and tell Bella...

TheFriendlyGhost: !? No, Alice! DON'T-

NotAlbino: ... Jasper?

TheFriendlyGhost: Hello, Bella.

NotAlbino: Could you please tell Edward to log on?

TheFriendlyGhost: I would, but Tanya's on one computer, Emmett's surfing porn on another, and that's all there is because Edward left HIS at home!

RedRose: Emmett's doing WHAT!?

TheFriendlyGhost: Kidding, Rosalie! I was KIDDING! What've you been doing, anyway, just watching the werewolves talk for the past... hour, about whether Jacob's smexy or not?

RedRose: I was already laughing, but then YOU came into the conversation...

Murky: You were spying on us, bloodsucker!?

RedRose: Anyone can 'spy' on you, Murky.

Moony: Now, now, let's not get our panties in a knot.

PixieGirl: Excuse me?

NotAlbino: Jacob, now is NOT the time.

Moony: What the hell!? I started this conversation anyway! You all just butted in rudely!

MoonyFollower: I second Jacob!

Murky: Oh, go AWAY, Seth!

MoonyFollower: Why don't YOU go away, Leah!?

Murky: Because I'm automatically better than you, twerp!

TheBigOne: What have I missed? Hi, Rose!

RedRose: Hello... Emmett.

TheBigOne: ... Why do you seem suspicious?

RedRose: Oh... no reason. I'm checking you computer's history when you get back.

TheFriendlyGhost: I was KIDDING, Rose!

RedRose: I. Don't. Care.

[Blondie has signed in]

Blondie: Hello!

Moony: ...

Murky: ...

MoonyFollower: ...

NotAlbino: ... Hello, Tanya. Is Edward there?

Blondie: Would you like me to let him use my computer?

NotAlbino: Would you? Thanks!

Blondie: ... Okay...

[Blondie has signed out]

MindReader: Did you need something, love?

Moony: Woah there, Eddie-poo... You KNOW it makes me blush when you call me that!

MindReader: ...

MoonyFollower: :D

MindReader: ... ANYWAY... Bella?

NotAlbino: Why would you go off to Denali without telling me!?

PixieGirl: Or inviting me!

RedRose: Or ME!

Murky: Or telling ME, so I could break into your fridge while you were away!

Moony: That was actually pretty good, Lee-Lee! :D

Murky: Call me that again, and I'll rip your throat out.

NotAlbino: Esme says "Leah, dear, you're welcome to our fridge at any time, just so you know that."

Murky: ... I was KIDDING, Mrs. Cullen. I actually DO have a house, WITH a fridge available...

RedRose: So does the dog you all call 'Jacob,' but HE always eats at our place.

Moony: My house is Paul-Infested.

Murky: Pity him, dammit! He has PAUL at his place!

NotAlbino: Why doesn't he eat at your house, then?

Murky: I'm his Beta, not his damn cook.

Moony: Why can't you be both, Leah?

Murky: I'm going to kill you...

NotAlbino: Renesmee would like me to tell you, Leah, not to kill Jacob. She says it would make her very depressed.

Murky: Why the hell should I care!?

Moony: That's so very kind of you, Nessie! (Make sure you relay that to her in an overly-done British accent) But shouldn't she be asleep!? She has to get enough rest, you know, Bella. She's not DEAD, like YOU. Tell her to go to bed, or I'll come at her with a Tickle-Attack!

Murky: ...

NotAlbino: I am her mother, Jacob, I know damn well how to take care of her, so stop lecturing me about her needs!

Moony: Geez! I was only offering a suggestion! You don't need to snap at me every time I take an interest in Nessie's life!

MindReader: Well, she'd ALWAYS be snapping at you then, you nosy dog.

RedRose: Tell Nessie that I'll do her hair in the braid that she likes if she goes to bed!

NotAlbino: I'm not bribing or threatening her, thank you very much! She's asleep now, anyway.

MindReader: Kiss her forehead for me, won't you, love?

NotAlbino: Of course.

TheBigOne: Yeah, yeah, yeah, we GET it! You all LOVE her! Now let's go back to the subject of whether or not Jacob is smexy, I got loads of nmaterial for that!

NotAlbino: WELL then! BE insensitive!

Murky: :D I agree with TheBrainlessOne! Let's go back a few subjects!

TheBigOne: THANK you, Leah... hey! That was uncalled for.

PixieGirl: It was funny, though.

Moony: Again... not bad, not bad at all, Murky.

Murky: I'd say he's a... six and a half on a scale of one to ten.

Moony: !?

NotAlbino: His rating went up when he became a werewolf, though. You know, the muscle...

PixieGirl: I'd have marked him a two before his first morph...

RedRose: He's got potential, if he lets his hair grow out again.

Murky: That's inconvenient for wolves, though.

PixieGirl: SACRIFICES MUST BE MADE FOR LOOKS!

TheBigOne: He's hot alright. I mean... he might even give JASPER a run for his money! Not me, though. Or Edward. Or anyone else, really. But I always thought Jasper was the least appealing.

Moony: -Blushes- You DO!? Thanks, man!

TheFriendlyGhost: ... What the hell?

PixieGirl: I find him to have a 'dangerous' look, and he's really a very good kisser! If you have a problem with my Jasper, EMMETT, I suggest you think twice before commenting! And I always thought your curly hair was girly!

RedRose: Watch it, PixieGirl. Emmett's my man, and therefore, I will defend him.

PixieGirl: Bring it on, Blondie!

NotAlbino: What are you talking about, is Tanya back?

Moony: No, see, Rosalie was Blondie before Tanya was Blondie. And Edward would be gone if Tanya was here. So... really, we all have a catfight to look forward to.

Murky: Then again, Jake... I'd have to say your ego makes your score drop to a four.

Moony: YOUR score would be a two!

TheBigOne: It would be a nine, and you KNOW it, pup.

Murky: ... Thank... you?

RedRose: What would I be, Emmett?

Moony: Oooooooooh... pressure's ON, leech! Gonna impress you leech lady!?

Murky: Oooooooooooh...

RedRose: ...

TheBigOne: Easy-Peasy, Rose! You'd be a ten!

RedRose: ...

Murky: ONLY a ten!? Damn, men know NOTHING!

Moony: Well what was he supposed to say!? Eleven!?

Murky: He should've said, "Rose, you're too far on the scale for me to comprehend."

TheBigOne: But that sounds like I think she's gaining weight!

RedRose: DO you now, Emmett!?

TheBigOne: NO! You're perfect, Rose, I love you!

RedRose: ...

Murky: SOMEONE screwed up badly...

NotAlbino: Edward would never do that.

RedRose: PSH! Edward waited 'till MARRIAGE, Bella! That automatically puts him in DEAD last on the most appealing list!

PixieGirl: True, you bring up a very good point, Rosalie.

TheFriendlyGhost: Am I first?

Moony: It's you, me, Emmett, Edward, and Jasper competing, isn't it?

TheFriendlyGhost: Yes...

Murky: Well, that just about sums it up! I say that it goes Jacob (purely because YOU don't smell disgusting, don't get your hopes up), Jasper (he has cool hair), Emmett (TheBigOne), and lastly Edward.

MindReader: Last!?

NotAlbino: You're first to me, and half the girls at school, Edward.

Murky: Brainless people, basically.

Moony: Gee, Leah. Are you SURE you aren't crushing on me? ;)

Murky: ... I've just expressed the desire to kill you TWICE, Mighty Alpha. I think it's safe to say that I'm physically attracted to you. Just something about your sweaty, copper skin, black eyes, and muscles...

Moony: ...

Murky: ... Makes me want to throttle you until your eyes roll upwards and out of sight, and laugh at the knowledge that I caused your death at the funeral.

Moony: I always knew you loved me.

Murky: No... that's not it. I have a passion for you. A deep, burning, ACHING hatred.

Moony: That's what I'm here for!

MoonyFollower: I'm getting uncomfortable with this sudden change of subject...

Murky: No one's making YOU stay, twerp!

MoonyFollower: PSH!

[MoonyFollower has signed out]

TheBigOne: Still mad at me, Rose? :'(

[RedRose has signed out]

TheBigOne: -sigh- Rosalie!

[TheBigOne has signed out]

MindReader: Good night, love... I see no point in staying if we're going to discuss Jacob's 'smexiness.'

NotAlbino: Good night, Edward.

[MindReader has signed out]

[NotAlbino has signed out]

PixieGirl: -GASP- JASPER! Is that YOU!?

TheFriendlyGhost: Yep.

PixieGirl: Awww! you came BACK!

TheFriendlyGhost: Yep.

[PixieGirl has signed out]

[TheFriendlyGhost has signed out]

Murky: ...

Moony: It's just you and me, then, Leah!

Murky: ...

Moony: Where were we before we were so rudely interrupted?

Murky: ... STEP AWAY FROM THE SHOVEL, BLACK!

Moony: ... -muahaha-...

What Else?

Written By:surfgirl1
You can read the original here:
All credit goes to the original author

While standing in my room, I pick up my weathered copy of Wuthering Heights, and sit down in my rocking chair. After a few seconds of distracted reading, I slam the book shut with a frustrated sigh.

Edward was away hunting, along with the entire Cullen family, leaving me to be completely bored back home. It had happened before, sure, but somehow this time was even more boring. It was spring break, so its not like I had school or anything. Charlie was fishing, again, while Angela was visiting relatives in California. What was a girl to do?

An inkling of an idea came worming its way into my mind, but I tried to push it away. The Cullens didn’t exactly know all about me, and I didn’t want to ruin their trust by announcing it now. Finally the idea grew and took shape, and somehow looked so much better than at first.

Walking across the room, collecting stray pieces of clothing and paper as I went, I made my way to the stereo. Dumping the pile in the corner, where it wouldn’t be in the way, I switched on my speakers and plugged in my MP3 player. Finding the song I wanted, I put it on pause and went into my closet.

Even though Alice had ransacked and searched endlessly in my closet for something fashion worthy, she still hadn’t explored its deepest darkest secrets.

Reaching into a little used box in the corner, I pulled out some stretchy black dance pants and a blue camisole. Pulling them on, I felt the familiar feeling of anticipation enter my body. Walking outside, I no longer felt like Bella Swan, girlfriend to the amazing and dreamed of Edward Cullen, I was Isabella Marie, top dancer in my class.

Picking up the remote, I turned on my favorite arm-up song; Right Round by Flo Rida.

When the music started, I completely let go of all emotion except adrenaline. I danced for hours, completely forgetting about when Edward was coming back.

Finally, I reached the best song ever, Don’t Trust Me by 30H!3. Starting out slow, I made my way up to the chorus. I sped up, keeping my eyes closed as I moved. Finally the end, and I posed. I could only hold it for so long though, before I fell down giggling.

“Well. I think that was the best thing I’ve seen all day.” The velvety voice came from my rocking chair.

I spun, gasping, and toppled over. Before I could hit the ground, however, I was in his arms, back in the rocking chair.

“It’s amazing how graceful you are when you dance, yet when you walk you are a disaster. How come you never told me about this, love?” I hid my face in the crook of his neck, completely embarrassed. He must have felt my blush, however, because he lifted my chin up to make me look at him.

Smiling slightly, he spoke, “Alice saw it in a vision. I had to see it to believe it.”

Kissing my hair, he murmured, “I always knew you were amazing. You just had to see it.”

I relaxed back into him with a happy sigh. The weight of the secret was lifted from my shoulders, and I felt amazing.

“So. What else can you do?”

Wherever You Are

Written By:I Have Alot Of Blonde Moments
You can read the original here:
All credit goes to the original author

Come out Moon

Come out Wishing Star

Come out, come out

wherever you are

26 year old Esme Evenson stood at the top of the cliff and gazed off into the horizon. She had nothing left, except memories.

I’m out here in the dark

All alone and wide awake

Come and find me

I’m empty and I’m cold

And my heart’s about to break

Come and find me

Even though she’d married Charles Evenson, she couldn’t keep her mind off the doctor that fixed her broken leg when she was 16.

I need you to come here and find me

‘Cause without you I’m totally lost

I’ve hung a wish on every star

It hasn’t done much good so far

I can only dream of you

Wherever you are

And now her baby was gone. She had nothing to live for anymore.

I’ll hear you laugh

I’ll see you smile

I’ll be with you

Just for a while

She’d been climbing a tree when she’d fallen and broken her leg. Her parents had rushed her to hospital and that’s when she met him. The person that she couldn’t get out of her mind. Dr Carlisle Cullen.

But when the morning comes

And the sun begins to rise

I will lose you

Because it’s just a dream

When I open up my eyes

I will lose you

She’d had alot of dreams, all centring around him. It was true, he was truly unforgettable.

I used to believe in forever

But forever’s too good to be true

I’ve hung a wish on every star

It hasn’t done much good so far

I don’t know what else to do

Except to try and dream of you

And wonder if you are dreaming too

Wherever you are

Wherever you are

Without a second thought she flung herself off the cliff into darkness. She couldn’t feel anything, her body was numb. Then she heard a voice. The voice she’d dreamt of for 10 years. She’d found Carlisle Cullen again.

My Past, My Future, Only The Present Matters

Written by: One Wish Magic
You can read the original here:
All Credit goes to the original author

(Alice Pov)

The rain fell like glistening silver bullets around me. It splashed into already existent puddles; rippling the water as, in ever expanding circles it rushed away from the disturbance. The cold easterly wind blew, catching hold of my scarf and making the tassels dance in it's wake. The clouds rolled by at an exaggerated pace overhead; the mass of black and Grey churning ominously. There was a storm brewing.

Unlike the last scattering of people who made their way quickly to their vehicles; umbrellas, coats and even in one case, this mornings newspaper held protectively over their heads. I was unaffected by the weather. The coldness did not chill me; indeed I could have be wearing one of my summer dresses instead of the only visually appropriate coat and scarf I wore now, and still the wind would feel like nothing more than silk brushing against my skin. The rain did not wet me; it simply rolled off the granite surface of my skin, and collected like small glistening gems in my hair. The only thing that was affected by it's onslaught was my clothes, and, as slightly peeved as I was, I knew that I could have them dry again in no time if I decided to run. But, the biggest difference of all between me and every other person here, the one thing that separated us so greatly. They were human, I was a vampire, and to my mind I always had been.

I was surrounded, rows upon rows of Grey stone structures jutting up from the ground. Each different from it's neighbor, some big and grand, others decorative; even in one or two places the traditional headstone was replaced by an angle upon a podium. But on the whole, most were simplistic. They were all of a varying degree of age. Some were unkept and ravaged by the passed years, while others bore blossoming flowers and looked to be fairly recent. But for all their differences, each and every one shared a common purpose; to signify, to celebrate, to mark the passing of and to proclaim. Each one marked a persons life, or in some cases, multiple peoples. Their beginnings and their ends. One life, the only life they would ever know.

I felt like I was trespassing upon the grave of another's loved one. Sitting where I had no place. But it was obvious that no-one had visited this grave in a long time, if it had ever been visited at all. It was small and looked to have been quickly and roughly crafted. It's jagged edges were very prominent when compared to the smooth rounded shape of it's neighboring headstone. It was wild and overgrown, the long grass almost engulfing it completely, the reeds wrapped tightly around it's base seemed to be the only thing keeping the stone erect. It held the most basic of inscriptions, the writing shaky and almost scrawl like; 'Mary Alice Brandon 1901-1920'

She might as well have been a stranger to me, a human girl from another's life, as I had no recollection of ever being her. Not even the distorted image that my family had, like trying to see through a clouded haze. Nothing. Just darkness. All consuming, perpetual darkness.

What would it have been like to have been human? To shiver when it was cold, what a curious sensation that would have been. To get wet in the rain, to run and feel tired. To breath out of necessity instead of habit, feeling air rush into my lungs and then back out again when I exhaled, how glorious and refreshing would it feel? Or would it feel glorious and refreshing at all? Would I forget to do it like I sometimes did now, or was it instinct, just like hunting? What would it have felt like to blush out of embarrassment? To feel the beat of a heart inside of me! Pumping blood around my body, allowing me to live, beating faster when I was scared and slower when I was relaxed. The very core behind my existence, a life sustaining organ!

What was it like to eat? To feel hunger instead of thirst. For my stomach to rumble when I needed to eat, just like Bella's did, instead of the burn in the back of my throat as my thirst grew. What was it like to be enticed by food? To find the aroma inviting instead of repulsing. Never once could I recall a morsel of food passing my lips. Of course I would have had to have ate at some point, but I just couldn't envision it. What did food actually taste like? Surly not like it tasted to us. Had I liked and disliked certain things or had I just ate anything that was offered to me?

What was it like to sleep? Was it like the crushing and oppressing darkness that had been my life, or would I dream? There was another question. What was it like to dream? To enter a world where anything was possible, a place projected by the subconscious mind that allowed people to find answers, truth or clarity. Or would my dreams have been nonsense like with no meaning behind them at all?

So much I had missed out on, and so much I would never experience. Bella was all to eager to become one of us, and I was just as eager to have her as my sister. But just for a moment, maybe a moment of madness on my part, I had to agree with Rosalie. She should savor the time she had left, prolong it even, For once it was gone it was irredeemable. I would trade a decade in this life for even just one day of human life. To experience what I could never remember feeling and know what I could never remember knowing.

I traced the lettering with my finger, even now tying to familiarize the name, to link it to myself somehow. But the more I thought about it, the more anything I might have remembered seemed to slip further and further from my grasp. But there was nothing to remember, not even the pain of my transformation.

My thoughts turned to Rosalie, what she wouldn't give to be human. To have married another human, had children and then grown old together. All she had ever wanted, and all that had ever been denied to her. Of course she had Emmett, and could not deny how happy he made her, but there was always going to be something, right at the back of her mind nagging away. Both of them understood and both of them excepted. He would have been the sort of man that she would have fallen in love with in any lifetime. Their love was the real thing, they were just not able to expand that love greater than the two of them.

My thoughts then turned to Esme, how she had tried to take her own life because the life of her tiny baby had been taken from her. She had us now, an adoptive family to whom she could play mother. But surly it had to be a poor substitute? Or perhaps a good one, she had in a sense what Rosalie did not, and as a comparison Esme was much happier than Rose.

I had never felt the maternal instinct that my adoptive mother and sister did. Maybe if I had ever held a child in my arms, whether my own or not, I would feel different.

I thought sourly of my real mother I imagined her face withered and hag like as she sat in a rocking chair, surrounded by darkness. I imagined myself as an infant, hidden and lost in the darkness; crying, screaming for any small comfort. Her face never changed as I continued to cry, she ignored me, or rather, to her as to me now, Mary Alice Brandon never existed.

I drew my knees up to my chin, wrapping my arms around them as I hugged them close to my body. Resting my head upon them, I closed my eyes, the tearless sobs wracking my body at random intervals. A feeling of loneliness washed over me. Just like in my imagined scene, I was alone.

I had no beginning, t least in my mind. I had always been what I am now. How could anything exist without a beginning? Did it make me lesser? In some way inferior?

Darkness, my only human memory. I had evaded James had I not? In much the same fashion as Bella had last summer, the two of us, the only two people to ever escape a tracker. I may not have remembered, but he had. How quint that because of him I was here now.

Was I a curse? Some sort of bad omen? Was that why my mother had shunned me, disowned me. Because of my visions? Of course it had been, that was why she had put me in the asylum, but why? Had my visions hurt people? Was that it, or was it simply because they were different, unnatural? Whatever the reasoning, in my mind it in no way excused my treatment.

What about the vampire that had changed me, my creator, the old one? How and why had he left me wan it was so unheard of? Was I really so much of a burden? Or had a been a curse upon him too? A blight to his existence.

I didn't know and no-one could provide me with the answers I sought. Finding out about my past had not pacified me as I thought it would. There was no euphoric feeling of having belonged somewhere, to finally know of my life before my transformation. No. Nothing of the sorts, the only thing this revelation had brought about was even more questions. Unanswerable ones.

Perhaps it was better that I did not remember my human life. After all my life now was all that I really cared about, nothing tied me to the life of Mary Alice Brandon.

I suppose none of it mattered really, I had existed before I knew all of this, perfectly happily in fact, albeit with gaping holes in my memory. My first real memory was the one I counted as the beginning of my life, seeing Jasper's face and knowing that I had to find him.

This life was my second chance, to have what I had never had before. Here I had a mother and a father, or as close to as I had ever known, a wonderful husband and brothers and sisters for whom I cared for deeply. They were my real family and this was my real life, nothing else mattered, or it shouldn't anyway. But still, I would always wonder, what would it have been like?

For a while I remained sitting, thinking and waiting. Waiting for what I didn't rightly know, a sign perhaps, all I knew was that I would be sure when it arrived.

I jumped a little when the vision burst behind the eyelids of my still closed eyes;
Jasper speeding down a long road, his face set determinedly, weaving in and out of traffic to gain more distance quicker. He was in a hurry. Annoyed drivers honked their horns as he sped past, but he paid them not heed. His lips parted and he spoke two words; “I'm coming.”

My vision ended and I was forced back into reality, but now a brighter reality than before. My Jasper was coming for me!

It had begun to grow dark now, the rain still continued in much the same fashion as it had done all day. But now it was joined by dull, distant rolls of thunder to the west.

I sat as still as a statue waiting for him, just as I had done many years ago in that half empty diner in Philadelphia.

It was no surprise when a voice called my name. My real name.
“Alice?!” What was a surprise however, was the urgency within the tone.

He rushed forward at break neck speed and swept me up into his strong muscular arms. Holding me so close that for a second I forgot that we were two people instead of one.

“Sweetheart I -” He began but I cut him off with my wail.

“Oh Jazz!” I buried my head deep into his marble chest as relief washed over me.

“Alice, ” he whispered my name, pressing his smooth lips to the top of my head and kissing me. I felt his arms rock me gently as hundreds of emotions washed over me at once, and I knew that he was experiencing them with me. The sobs that had racked my petite frame before now returned.

He did not stop the onslaught, for which I was thankful for, he let it come. Here in his arms I was safer, stronger and more able to think this through than I had been all day. Every now and again he spoke words of encouragement and comfort to me, but for the most part he remained silent, holding me and listening.

When I had finished unleashing my emotional tsunami upon him, he placed his hand against my cheek, gently caressing it while he sent his own smoothing waves back to me.

Once or twice as he soothed me, I caught him reproachfully looking at my headstone.

“The absence of memories from a human life does in no way change you Alice. But if you wish we shall search for some more answers, more conclusive ones. If you feel you must know exactly why, then we shall find out.”

I didn't answer, I couldn't for he had completely and utterly stolen my breath. Another rush of emotions assaulted me.

“Oh Jasper, I don't deserve you,” I cried. Burying my head into the crevice of his neck, inhaling deeply the scent that was like heaven to me.

“As I don't deserve you.” I was about to protest, but then he continued;

“And yet by the most golden of luck in the world, we seem to be bound to each other. Uncanny.”

“Remarkable,” I agreed.

He smiled down at me, clearly relieved to see that I had been soothed. I knew I had been right before in thinking that nothing other than what I had now mattered. Jasper was my proof, the sign that I needed.

“I love you Alice Cullen.”

“As I love you Jasper Hale.”

I took his hand; while the other still cradled me, and without thinking; I lent in and touched my lips to his, for the first time today, I felt hope. His lips responded to mine, moving in sync. I dislodged the gem like droplets that had gathered in is honey blond hair with my hand, and his fingers wound round mine, lacing out intertwined hands even tighter together.

It was a kiss that spoke a thousand words at once. Jasper was my life, just as I were his. The two of us, misfits, the odd exceptions. We belonged to each other. Two pieces of the same puzzle, molded, shaped always with the other in mind. All of this now was meant to be. Nothing before or even after mattered.

I pulled away first, he did not protest and willing let me.

“I don't need any more answers, I have all those I need, right here,” I traced the line of his cheekbone with my finger.

I bit my lip preparing myself to ask the question I was dreading.

“Does it matter? Does it matter that I know now?” His brow creased a little at my questions and then smoothed out.

“Not to us. Not to me and you, especially not to me, and not to our family. You are the same Alice I fell in love with, only now you are not quite as in the dark about your past as you were. The only person it matters to is you, sweetheart.”

I smiled sadly.

“Perhaps it would have been better if I had never found out.”

Jasper gave a small laugh, his chest rumbling underneath my head.

“You would have found out eventually, my love. You are far to inquisitive sometimes.” I had to laugh with him.

“No, I think this was something you had to find out,” Jasper mused aloud, “Something you were meant to know, so you could deal with. You say perhaps it would have been better if you had never found out. Maybe so, but you cannot deny to me that you would not have grown restless over the years. Have grown restless. Searching for something, anything that might help you to understand.”

“No I cannot deny it,” I admitted. “It just wasn't what I was expecting.”

I was hoping that that darkness would have been replaced by perhaps a memory, so I could build a picture in my head to chase it away. But that wasn't the case. The darkness was my memory, for that was all I had known.

“I know.” His smooth lips kissed my cheek. “But none of our human lives turned out exactly as we planned, but now we have this one, our second chance; which is more than what a lot of people have. And since I get to spend it with you, I intend to male the most of it.”

“As do I.” He held me closer for a second.

“If you will permit me, there is something I feel I must do.” He whispered gently, lowering me to the ground and setting me down upon my feet. He was not really waiting for the answer he knew I would give him, but at the same time he was allowing me to give it.

I was consumed by wonder immediately. He had not made a certain decision so I could not see what he was planning. The image of him running through a forest did not give me much inclination to his motives.

“I permit you.”

With a swift kiss, he left my side. I stood alone, for maybe the space of a single heartbeat before he returned to me.

He took my hand in his and led me forward, a single red rose clasped lightly in his other. We moved at human speed.

The rain still fell around us both, and the thunder in the west was closer now. Dusk drew in.

He led me to my rather derelict stone, dropping my hand he stooped to place the rose before it. Only once glancing up at the writing.

“Hardly a fitting tribute,” I heard him mumble.

His fingers were busy then, quickly easing a pattern into the stone just above it's original writing. I watched as his smooth calligrapher writing was carved into the stone as easy as if he had taken pen to paper.

Now as he stepped back I could admire his words. His writing stark in contrast to the untidy scrawl beneath it. My headstone now read; 'In Loving Memory of Mary Alice Brandon 1901-1920.'

“Oh Jasper!” I launched myself at him, my arms encircling his muscular chest, and his wrapped around my waist.

“I love you in this life, I see no reason why I would not have loved you in that one.”

I didn't know what to say, I was so overwhelmed. But since my man knew my emotions as well as he did. He took his unspoken thank you and gratitude from my complete lack of words.

“Come now, you have lingered here long enough. Let us go home to our family. Esme will surly be worried sick by now.” Jasper shook his head slightly smiling.

“We had better hurry then.” I would not see it done to have Esme's worry prolonged.

He took my hand in his, and together, we departed. I stole one last look back, preparing to leave whatever my life had been before where it belonged.

This was my life now. With him. With my family.

You Know, To Me You Are Perfect

Written By:NeverCriticizeRomeo
You can read the original here:
All Credit goes to the original author

Your beautiful eyes stare right into mine
and sometimes I think of you late at night
I don't know why
I wanna be somewhere where you are
I wanna be where...

I rushed out of the plane, eager to meet my wonderful boyfriend. I hadn’t seen Jasper in so long. When I went away to go help my best friend Bella with her wedding, I missed Jasper the whole time. I did my best to not complain, but I missed him so much.

I loved remembering the twenty-four years we had spent together. Living next door to him, was the best thing that ever happened to me. We were friends for a long time, and knowing that he loved me, made me want to see him more.

I looked around for the face I was excited to see. After the long months away from my friends and family I was unbelievably torn from not even getting a glimpse of him every hour or even a day.

your here, your eyes are looking into mine
so baby, make me fly
my heart has never felt this way before
I’m looking through your
I’m looking through your eyes..

I scanned the crowd and spotted the man I constantly thought about. When our eyes met we were ten feet away from each other. Although I wanted to run and embrace Jasper, I stared into his beautiful eyes, just like ocean blue. His blonde hair fell into his eyes, and I noticed it had grown a bit or maybe it was me imagining. His lips turned into a grin, and he pulled out a poster from behind him. I looked at him confused, but I focused my eyes to read the words. Alice promise me, you’ll always love me

I wake up, I’m alive
in only a little while, I’ll cry
cause your my lullaby
so baby, come hold me tight
cause I, I wanna be everything you need
I wanna be where...

I smiled at the words I saw. The big simple letters were written in my favorite color. I giggled girlishly, and nodded my head. He smiled to show me he understood and let the poster slip from his fingers, as it fell to the floor. I took a step forward, and another poster replaced the first one first one. To me, you are perfect

your here, your eyes are look-in into mine
so baby, make me fly
my heart has never felt this way before
I’m looking through your
I’m looking through your eyes..

I smiled viciously at him, and I saw him take a step toward me. I felt my suspicion grow like wild fire. I took a few steps more toward him, and nodded my head, encouraging him to go on. If it was even possible his smile got bigger. His perfect white teeth glowed, as he let the poster fall to leaving one more. You should know that I would like to ask you one question

Just as long as your mine
I’ll be your everything tonight
let me love you, kiss you
baby, let me miss you
let me see your...
dream about, dream about your eyes
eyes, eyes, beautiful eyes...

I took dainty, slow steps closer as he dropped his final posters. His long legs walked toward me, and he closed the gap between us. He smiled, as the final step between us, was used to kneel down. In front of me I felt the tears in my eyes threatening to spill, as I prepared my answer, for the question that was unasked.

“Alice I love you so very much, with all of my heart. Will you marry me?” I smiled and I pressed my lips to his. They were soft and warm and the kiss was gentle, and short. When we pulled apart, I had my arms wrapped around him. “So may I guess that it’s a yes?” I nodded my head for what felt like the millionth time today. He wrapped his arms around my waist and though I really would have like to have started planning the wedding, I stayed in his arms and enjoyed the moments we spent together.

Emotions

Written by:13.shimer.13
You can read the original here:
All credit goes to the original author

Alice. She danced into the room with grace, with poise, with charm and a wide smile. A smile for me, Jasper, one so undeserving of her happy gaze. And my Alice, my hope, is so much different from everybody I know, so much better. More beautiful than cynical Rosalie, much more graceful than clumsy Bella, more outstanding than motherly Esme.

Happy.

Nobody can compare to my pixie girl, my hope and happiness. Nobody can even attempt to compare to her at all.

Most vampires, when they find out about my Alice’s talents want her to tell them everything, want to abuse her powers, enslave her to their will, and don’t even bother trying to get to know her. Luckily for the kind Cullens they weren’t like most vampires and accepted Alice for who she is, enjoyed her quirkiness and love of shopping. Of course, had they so much as suggested abusing her powers, had their emotions even slipped to greed and want, I would have corrected them on how to treat my Alice, my happiness. I like to think I would have installed some fear- I have enough scars to make even the biggest of vampires scared and if that doesn’t do the trick, I can always douse them with a good serving of hysterical fear- but who knows? They did outnumber us.

But that was the past and the Cullens are my family, from compassionate Carlisle to blushing Bella (and in between that endearing Esme, enormous Emmett, roaring Rosalie, and emo Edward). Oh yeah- there’s also my angelic Alice and I; jealous Jasper. I’m jealous if you’re happy, I’m jealous if you laugh. I’m jealous at a simple smile. Because I begrudge your freedom of expression. Unless you’re Alice, of course.

I love Alice.

And she loves me too! I feel it in all that she does and in all the words she speaks. I see it in her tawny eyes; it’s always there in her perfect smile. Her voice radiates love- towards me! I feel as though it follows me and it’s always in my mind- the next time I can be with my Alice, my hope.

She is pure beauty.

I’ve read some of the books; I’ve seen most of the movies and I know that our love- flying high and true, a flag- beats it all. I don’t care how the characters will meet; they may bump into each other, I won’t care.

Alice and I are fate.

Our very meeting was destiny. It’s surprisingly comforting to know that there’s someone somewhere watching me and helping me along the way. If I ever meet them I must thank them for Alice and my family.

I must also tell them off for Maria- crazed woman wrecked my life! (And in turn bought me nearer to Alice . . . but I’m definitely not above a little hypocrisy to get my point across. Besides, I like to lie to myself, it presents a refreshing challenge.)But I digress.

The thing is, Alice is my existence. Without her it’d be wild and unbearable. Three quarters of me would be missing; the last quarter left confused, broken and shell shocked. I understand this sort of thing (emotions are my forte) and so although it’s nice to think this is an exaggeration, I know the truth: this is an understatement, far off of the amount of pain and terror I’d feel without my Alice, my hope and happiness.

Being with Alice I’m so much happier than I was even as a human- it felt like there was always something missing. And I think I know that, subconsciously, I was waiting for Alice. And she was waiting for me, Jasper, in that stupid asylum. And I was unaware, couldn’t be with her, and couldn’t do anything to help her. And then we met in that bar and I felt hope for the first time.

Bubbly

Written by: voi ch'intrate
You can read the original post here:
All Credit goes to the Original Author

Bubbly

Everything had grown pleasantly quiet. With Edward out of the house, and therefore the house exponentially quieter, it was easier to think. As much as I loved my dear brother, and his constant banging on his piano, it was nice when everything was so silent. Esme and Carlisle were gone hunting somewhere to the East, the Appalachian Mountain Range, if my visions were correct. From my last marker, they were in West Virginia and therefore had no cell phone signal. We all took this to mean they wanted their privacy.

Emmett and Rose had taken the hint and took a flight to Paris last night. That endeavor was one I would most fervently be blocking from my mind.

So, Edward and Bella, Jasper and I were left to hold down the fort. Nessie was sleeping over at Charlie’s house. I swear that man loved her more than he loved Bella. I had no idea where Jacob was, nor did I particularly care. Once his aspirin-like qualities had served their purpose, there really was not too much need for me to like him. Quite frankly, I was still slightly pissed that he had made Edward’s future disappear for a full two minutes during his brief consideration of murdering Edward after Bella’s imminent departure from humanity.

Not that I hadn’t briefly fancied pulling Edward’s limbs off one-by-one and then burning him slowly with Zippo lighters; but still, my sordid fantasies did not make me blind as a bat. Oh the sweet irony…

I sat in the middle of the floor on the Oriental rug, braiding the tassels together; because, seriously, I had nothing better to do. Shopping was no fun without a partner, and I didn’t enjoy playing the idiotic video games Jasper and Emmett so loved.

Jasper had gone out to hunt in the forest nearby, and by my count he’d be home in 22 minutes…and 47 seconds…and 10 milliseconds.

My vision briefly blurred behind my closed lids. Jasper was changing his mind so quickly it gave me motions sickness. I saw nothing nefarious in the brief snippets of the future, so I settled my back against the couch, still idly braiding the fringe on the edges of the carpet.

The clock ticked loudly and Jasper’s future still reminded me of a Jackson Pollock painting. I would normally just switch my focus to someone else, but I was so tuned to him I couldn’t help but watch rapturously. I stopped trying to focus on the motives or the plot—but just his face. The scars that made him terrifying to others only made me want to trace them with my own lips. His sweet, blonde hair hung to the point of his chin, and across angles at his jaw.

I imagined myself sitting on his wide, sturdy lap, braiding his hair instead of the rug. Our brothers would probably be facetious if they ever knew he let me play with his pretty, sun-coloured hair; but, regardless of their immaturity I was still allowed to run my fingers through his yellow locks. He’d even embarrassedly admitted once, that he liked the way it felt. I was more than willing to comply.

I followed the planes of his face in my mind. His nose—a little too narrow for his face, but still lovely—and his high, pronounced cheeks bones, I liked to put my fingers there, to feel the bones beneath the granite skin. His long, pale, perfect lips, so much bigger than mine. I felt like a child kissing a grown man when I kissed him. And in a way, I was. The fact that we was nearly sixty years older than me never bothered me at all. Honestly, it only made him that much more desirable.

Someone chuckled behind me and my eyes snapped open. “What’s all the lust for, love?” Jasper asked, leaning over the back of the couch to look at me.

I smiled sheepishly up at him. In the blink of an eye, my 22 minutes were up. He chuckled and vaulted agilely over the back of the couch. He settled into the cushions behind my back. He sat so I was on the floor between his long legs. I rested my head against his left knee. He traced small circles against the nape of my neck with his marble fingernails.

“What are you thinking about, darlin’?” His Southern accent laced through his words prettily. I knew he only spoke this way for me. The fabulous “Hale twins” couldn’t have dual accents, and Rosalie’s refined upstate New York speech was just too different from his rich, Texan twang. He sacrificed his speech for me, so we could stay inconspicuous here.

I would be wherever he was. But he knew I was happy here. He would do anything to make me smile. I fingered the delicate, gold band around my left, ring finger. It was as thin as wire, and so barely visible. Jasper’s was nearly identical, just minutely thicker. It was a nice contrast to the scars peppering his hand.

I reached around my neck and grabbed his left hand and pressed my lips to the cool, metal band on his long finger. He softened behind me.

“I came home sooner, just for you.” He stated, proud of himself. My eyes flickered quickly to the grandfather clock. Twelve minutes had passed since I’d started counting. So that was why his future looked like a vomited mess, he was trying to take me by surprise; and it had worked.

He smiled triumphantly, lifting me into his lap. I wound my arms around his sturdy neck. He brushed his lips against my temple.

“Would you like to go shopping?” He inquired, playing with the fingers on my right hand. He placed my palm against his cheek as he spoke. “I know you’re bored here, I’d like to take you out and do somethin’.”

I shrugged. This was my favourite game to play and he knew it. I adored shopping, especially with him. Rose was nice to shop with, but somehow she always ended up looking at lingerie. I may be a woman, but dressing up in frilly panties for my husband is not my idea of fun. Shopping with Bella was ok; she was a little whiny, though. She always complained she was ‘tired’ so she could go camp out in the music store with Edward. She’s a vampire! She can’t get tired, and yet, that excuse gets me every time.

Jasper, however, carried all my bags, never complained and always bought me whatever I could desire. Though, all I ever truly desired was his company.

Jasper half smiled, “Shopping it is, little lady.”

I jumped up off his lap, clapping my hands in excitement.

“Oh, Jazz, you’re so wonderful!” I gushed, jumping up to wrap my arms around his shoulders and my legs around his waist. He kissed me softly.

“Come on, good lookin’, where too?” He asked, offering me his arm like the gentleman he was.

“Where do you want to go?” I challenged, genuinely curious.

“I’d go anywhere if it was with you,” he responded truthfully, leaning over to kiss the top of my head and bury his nose in my hair.

“I guess we’ll just see where we end up, then,” I said back coyly, winking at him. He smirked and nodded, walking beside me as we made our way to the garage.

He walked around to my Porsche. He raised an eyebrow at me and let me see his plans to ask for my keys. I sighed resignedly and threw them to him; they jingled as they spun through the air and landed in his outstretched palm. He smirked and got into the drivers side of the fabulous, canary yellow car.

Jasper left the windows rolled down, it was an overcast day, of course; but the clouds were thin and pure white, so the sun’s luminescent rays made everything glow. It wasn’t enough light to send our skin into a frenzy of rainbows, just a dull radiance that seemed beautiful rather than unearthly.

I sighed happily and plugged my iPod into the car adaptor. Jasper sent me a wary glance as I flicked through my songs, the clicker made that awful staccato noise through the nice speakers.

“Pick something good, please?” He pleaded softly, steering the car away from a sunny patch peaking through the clouds.

I gave him a mock-hurt look, sulking so that he would lean over and kiss my pouting lips. I quickly glanced into our future before deepening our kiss—no cops on the horizon, no random sunny spots, and no crashes that would damage my lovely, expensive car. Jasper obliged giving me my heated kiss. I leaned over the center console and twisted my fingers into his yellow hair.

The real reason I had gotten my car in yellow was strictly because it reminded me of Jasper. Yellow for his hair. Yellow for his eyes. Et cetera.

I sighed into his mouth and pulled away, knowing that we were going to have to make a left turn soon. Jasper was a good driver, but not that good of a driver. He blew out a deep breath and flicked on his turn signal.

I finally found what I was looking for on my iPod: the perfect song for my Jasper and I.

I hit the center button on the song’s title and the beginning notes floated through the car. Jasper looked over at me, an amused expression in his topaz eyes.

I shrugged and began to sing along with the song, closing my eyes and tossing my head back as I sang along. I could feel Jasper’s love and amusement seeping into my veins as it radiated from him. I tried to put off as much adoration as was inhumanly possible.

Jasper threw his head back and laughed raucously. “You know I love you, right?”

“I know,” I said as the song slipped into a musical interlude. The light airy notes floated through the air. Jasper slung his arm carelessly over my shoulders, humming along with the song—having been so effected by my euphoria.

I finished off the song, letting my voice carry louder over the original artist’s.

“It starts in my soul,

And I lose all control,

When you kiss my nose,

The feelin’ shows,

‘Cause you make me smile,

Baby just take your time now,

Holdin’ me tight.”

Don't Go

Written By: Drifting.Through.Black
You can read the original here
All credit goes to the author

“You’re beautiful, Alice, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise…not even me.” He adds the last bit as an afterthought, a clarification, just to make sure she completely understands what he’s saying. And she does, more than he knows. He’s telling her that she can make it, even without him and that when he leaves her, she’ll be okay. Except she won’t, and it’s just another example of how little he knows her, that he thinks she’ll be fine. He should know that she can’t live without him. He should know that he is her everything. He should know that she loves him more than life itself and if he’s not there, well then…was it really life?

Still, she pushes those thoughts away from her mind and lets herself reveal in the warmth of his body, so close next to hers and the touch of his fingers, so light and soft against her silken skin. She lets herself pretend it’s love that’s emanating off him, not remorse.

She knows she shouldn’t be doing this, that it is wrong and it will just increase the hurt she will feel when he leaves. But she can’t help herself. It just feels so wonderful, so right, that she can’t make herself pull away from his loving touch. She knows that if slowly, she starts to distance himself from him, just like he is doing from her, then the pain of their separation will be so much less. Yet the lure of his crooked smile and the feeling of his skin against hers keeps her there, and she’s trying to hold him down too.

He opens his mouth as if to speak but he closes it before the words are released, again. He’s done this more than twice before in the past hour and he does it often. She knows there’s something he wants to tell her, something special and maybe something hurtful or it may be something beautiful. She doesn’t know but boy does she want to. She’s hesitant though, stopping herself before asking him what it is. What if he was planning to tell her he’s leaving then? She doesn’t want to push him; she wants to keep him for as long as possible before the inevitable happens.

Still, what is he wants to tell her he loves her? What if that’s what he wants to tell her but he leaves before he does? As much as she wants to distance herself from him, she also wishes desperately he returns at least some semblance of the affection she holds for him. Because if he doesn’t, what really was the point of her futile life? All she’d ever lived for was him; all she ever still lives for is him. He’s been her everything since as long as she can remember and she can’t even imagine a life where he’s her nothing and she’s just some hitch in his long winding road. But that’s what it will be, once he’s gone she won’t mean a thing to him, he’ll forget her, yet she will never forget him. Never.

Whatever he wants to say to her, she wishes he just will. It’s killing her not knowing. She lies awake at night while he sleeps soundly and she watches his back as he chest rises and falls peacefully and she wonders what it is. If anything, it keeps her tied to him more. Maybe if she keeps showing she cares so much about him, he’ll tell her because if she turns away, he’ll think she doesn’t need to know. But she does, oh how she does. She would only ever turn her back to him to make some of the pain easier, nothing else would make her.

He doesn’t understand how much she loves him, he never has. He thinks everything is temporary, that nothing lasts, whereas she’s known it’d be forever since the day they met. Except now forever is coming crashing down around her because he can’t handle it. Forever is not a thing that processes well in his mind. And now she’s stuck between a rock and a hard place because she wants to stick to him, she wants to hold him and never let him go. She wants that when he leaves, she’ll follow him and she wants him to let her. But she knows she can’t, she knows it’s impossible.

So then she has to let go of him. She has to sit there and watch him walk away from her, never once looking back to see how she’s fairing. But she can’t shake the feeling that she’s doing the wrong thing by letting him leave. That in doing that she’s ruining both their lives, not just her own. And now she’s so confused because she has no idea which way to turn or what the hell to do.

She’s scared – no, she’s terrified – of what’s going to happen to her after he’s gone. He has been her reason for living, the air she breaths for so long that she doesn’t know how she’ll survive when it’s snatched away. He’s like a drug and she’s the addict. Druggies can go crazy when they stop, they can kill themselves, they can do anything. Is that what will happen to her? Will she go insane, even more so than she already is? Or will she kill herself, or worse, someone else? And even in the midst of all this pain, she knows that she can’t kill herself, because it would hurt him too much.

He’ll take her heart with him when he walks out that door, whether he wants it or not, it will always be his, and all that he will leave for her will be the broken shell of the woman she used to be. She will no longer be Alice after he’s gone, she will be an it, she will barely even be a living thing anymore. When he goes, he leaves a robot in the place of the girl whose heart he stole when they were only fourteen.

She remembers a time, they had been so young, when he would whisper ‘I love you’ in her ear every chance he got and take her hand and hold her body close to his, running his fingers up and down her arms as he told her how much she meant to him. She knows that he had never whispered in her ear anything about forever, but that’s what she had thought, even though he failed to say it. How naïve she had been. She knows she should have got out while she could, before it was too late. But then again, it had been too late since the first time she laid eyes on him.

She remembers when they used to curl up on the sofa and he would tell her his worries and his fears and everything he was feeling and she would take his head in her lap, running her fingers through his long locks and she would reassure him that everything would be okay, that she would always be there for him no matter what and they could get through everything together. She realizes now that he had never said that back to her.

Now he will never tell her what’s wrong, even though she already knows. He will never confide in her again, and that hurt her. Instead, he kept his feelings locked away, like he used to do, before she came along and fixed him. And she worries that maybe when she’s gone, he will go back to how he used to be and it scares her, because she had worked so hard to fix that broken man, stuck in a boy’s body. If he goes back to that she doesn’t know what she’ll do. It’s scaring her and its making her hold on tighter. Because, even if he doesn’t love her as much as she loves him, she knows he still needs her, even if he can’t see it. He’s letting go of her and in turn, he’s letting go of the part of him that was hers, the part that she had fixed. And she’s almost certain that he needs that part of himself, even if he doesn’t think he does.

He sighs and pushes away from her and suddenly she knows; that he’s going now and it’s too late to do anything about it.

“Don’t,” she says, even though she knows it futile. “Don’t go.” And in that moment, as he stares so intently at her it seems almost as if he can see into her very soul, he knows that she knows he’s leaving her. But he can also see that the hope he could almost always see burning hotly in her mocha eyes is gone. He knows that she knows there is no hope to get him to stay. That he’s leaving her no matter what. And he knows this is their last goodbye.

He stops and leans towards her again, because if she knows then he can do this one thing without hurting her more, or so he thinks. Slowly, almost painfully slowly, his lips swoop down to meet hers. Their last kiss starts out soft, quiet, full of remorse and pain and sorrow. Her tears fall steadily and mix with their lips. He won’t cry, because he’s not going to give into the emotion, but she can almost feel his regret, and she takes faint hope in that. That he doesn’t want to leave, not really, but he feels he has to. He’s stayed too long in one place. He can’t settle down and that’s what she wants. She wants him forever and he can’t give that to her. But still, there’s a part of him that wants forever with her too.

As their kiss lengthens, it becomes harder, rougher, and they’re trying to release all the pent up sadness and loss and pain as well as the anger and fury she had no idea was building up inside her. He shoves her roughly against the back of the couch, wanting to cause her something more than just emotional pain. Her spine hits the frame roughly, shooting flashes of hot pain through her body that somehow erases the pain inside for just one short moment. Well, at least she’s found something, a way to keep the turrets of emotional pain away: inflict her body with a different type.

Her arms rake down his back so hard they leave scratch marks. She’s branded him, if only for a little while. He’s tearing at her and her at him. His teeth bite into the tender flesh of her lip and her blood flows softly into their joined mouths. Pleasure mixes with plain and it’s as if their whole relationship is summed up in this one kiss. They’d been happy but they’d always known the end was coming, that it would undoubtedly end in pain. They had been balancing on the tip of a knife, trying desperately to stay balanced, not to fall. But now they’re falling down with only the ground to meet them and nothing to soften the impact. It would hurt at the bottom of the cliff they were falling off, but there was no going back now, it was way too late for that.

She’s holding him to her with all her might but still he can pull her off him and straighten up. Her lips are red and swollen and the bottom one’s torn and bleeding from where he bit it. Her eyes are red and blood-shot and he only notices now the large black circles living under her eyes. She has such a small, angel face that these changes make him see the monster he has become, that he has done this to her. He pushes himself up and off her, revealing more of her body and he can see the rest of the damage he’s inflicted. This was the point of his leaving, if he stayed he would undoubtedly become the monster he loathed but knew was hiding deep in his soul. Someday it would emerge and it would hurt her. But it already had. So now he has to run.

Before he can escape though, her tiny hand wraps itself around his wrist in a vice-like grip and he can’t pry her off him.

“Don’t go,” she says again. Her voice is hard and clear. She’s not asking him to stay, she’s ordering him. But he shakes his head firmly. He made up his mind a long time ago and he vowed he wouldn’t let her sway him.

“I have to,” he tells her, but he knows by the hard resolution in her eyes that she doesn’t believe him.

“Why?”

She thought she had given up hope on him saying. She thought she was going to let him go without a fight. But now she knows that him leaving is the wrong thing to do, that he needs to stay and that it is right. Somehow, she knows. He had kissed her like he needed her, he had kissed her like she had kissed him; like she was the reason he was living and without her he didn’t, couldn’t, live. So she is going to make him stay and she is going to make him live.

“I just do,” he says, because he can’t tell her the truth. She should know the truth. She is bruised and battered because of him, she should know that he is a monster and she should be running from him. Instead she’s trying her hardest to make him stay.

“I’m not buying it,” she says and he knows she’s telling him the truth. Her tears have stopped flowing now and the blood dripping from her lip has dried and she just looks…hard. He has made her hard. He is a monster. But he knows that if he leaves her now, she will follow him. And he can’t have that.

He sighs and prepares himself for the heartache.

“I don’t love you.”

But it doesn’t come.

“Yes you do.”

She’s firm, she’s resolute. She knows he loves her, she’s certain of it now, more certain than she’s ever been about anything else and he knows that he’s not going to be able to tell her no, that she’s too strong and smart to believe his lies and for once he wonders if maybe it would just be better if he stayed. He doesn’t know what to do, how to proceed. His heart is screaming at him to sit back down on that couch, take her into his arms and hold her forever, but still there’s the firm belief in his mind that he’s leaving her for her own good, and almost always his brain wins over his heart.

As if she can see his hesitation, she seizes it.

“What is your heart telling you, Jazz?” The hardness has left her voice and it’s been replaced only by compassion and love and understanding. It’s soft and musical and beautiful. And he hesitates.

“I don’t know,” he tells her truthfully, and the tears he promised himself would not come start to fall from his eyes. He squeezes them shut in defiance but still they fall, slowly and softly, as if even they are reminding him of her. He feels her fingers on his cheek and she’s brushing his tears away with her skin, trying to tell him she’s his without words.

“I love you, Alice,” he says, his eyes still closed, and her breath catches in her throat. After almost a year drought, he’s said it. “But I shouldn’t, I can’t. So I have to leave.”

“I love you too, Jasper and that’s all that matters. Love can conquer all, and it will.” But she’s said the wrong thing and the moment the words leave her lips she wishes she could take them back. He squeezes her hand tightly one last time and stands up, placing a quick kiss on her cheek.

“No. I’m sorry, Alice, but love cannot conquer all, not this time.” He drops her hand and she lets it flop lifelessly beside her. How can those few words turn the situation from working out, to falling even further off the metaphorical cliff? And how can they suddenly shrink her strong resolve and hope to nothing. She has lost, that was all she can think, and everything is bad again.

She watches as he walks to the door for the last time, the tears flowing freely and quickly down her face once more and the wound on her lip open again. But this time, he does look back, one last time.

“I’m sorry.” The words are a whisper, a last prayer and then he’s lost to the dark and the door swings shut behind him, a blast of freezing wind swirling through the warm room.

“Don’t go,” she whispers, but it is only to the air.

Give me what I want!

Written By : Nicki Sawai
You can read the original here: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4790465/1/Give_me_what_I_want
All Credit goes to the Original author

I couldn't be any more happier than I am right now!

"Oh, Edward! My wonderfully dead, sparkly soul mate! I need you to do something for me!" I trilled to my Edward.

"Oh, Bella, my clumsy little spider monkey! I shall give you anything you want!" He sang to me.

Oh, tra, la, la, fiddle dee dee, give me everything that will make me happy!

"I want-"

"Oh, Edward, I saw the future! You need to stop what you will do!" Alice danced up and shrieked at him.

"Alice, Alice, stop! My so easily breakable human girlfriend wants something from me! I must ignore all else and comply to her wishes!"

"No, no, you musn't! You will kill--!"

"Enough of your nonense! Bella, please continue."

"Edward, I want to be-"

"Edward!" Jasper ran up. "I can feel what Bella wants! Do not give it to her!"

"Stop this now!" Edward yelled. "Bella is getting unhappier by the second, I must give her everything that she wants!"

Ho, ho, ho, tee, tee, tee, why does everything have to be about me?

"Edward, it's really not that essential. Do not waste another thought on my human self, I'm not very important."

"Do not be silly! You are more important that blood!"

"You know that is not possible, Edward." Carlisle came up to us. "I should know, I'm a doctor."

"Yes, you a very smart and all-knowing." Alice said. "Tell Edward he is being a fool!"

"No! Bella is the most important thing! Now, tell me what it is that you want, Bella."

"Fine. I want you to turn--" I started.

"Eddie! How have you and little miss Bella been, eh?" Emmett bounded up to us. Ugh! I sighed out loud. Just something else to distract Edward from me, the most insignificant being in the entire world. Oh, woe is me, I do not deserve Edward's misplaced love.

"Edward!" I shouted. "I want to be a vampire!"

Silence. All five pairs of golden eyes stared at me.

"No! Anything but that! I cannot bear to see you in any pain! Besides, I would not be able to stop once I started to suck your blood. You cannot do this to me, Bella!"

"Edward, you said I could have anything I want! Now make me a vampire, right now!" I yelled at him, despaired.

Low, low, low, flee, flee, flee, Oh no, woe is me!

"No! Anything but this!" Edward hissed.

"Yes! If you do not turn me, I shall go to the werewolves and Jacob can have me!"

"No!" Edward roared. "That mutt is too fowl-smelling and crude to deserve you!"

"Then turn me! Please, Edward." I sobbed, my plain face in my hands.

He groaned. "Bella, Bella, no..."

"Please..."

He paused, but then huffed a deep breath, "Alright!" He announced.

"No!" Alice, Jasper and Carlisle cried out.

"Woo, more fun for me!" Emmett declared.

"Yes, I must do this!" Edward decided. I grinned triumphantly.

Then he leaned down and brought his face to my neck. He bit me, slowly and savoring the taste.

But, as said, he couldn't stop... He said he would never lie.

And you know what I did then? I DIED.