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All credit goes to the original author
We rode in the speed boat, the white moon hanging high above us on the dark sky. I glanced up at Jasper beside me, a smile creeping up my face. The moonlight hit the side of his face, casting a blue glow over his pale skin. He seemed to glow with an otherworldly calm that I hadn't seen since our travels together so long ago.
I leaned against his shoulder, his arm opening to pull me against his chest. His eyes flashed down at me as his hand remained clenched around the steering wheel.
"I'm happy we did this". I whispered running my hand along his cheek as he grinned.
That smile, so rarely seen yet when it appeared my dead heart fluttered. His smile, this special one reserved only for me, was like a blue moon. Only appearing only in the rarest of times. I only ever saw it when we were alone. Yet even then it wasn't as pure as it was now. At those times he usually had something on his mind. Something he needn't be concerned about yet still was.
"I as well". He whispered, his head turning down to kiss the top of my head.
I glanced back over the dark ocean to the outline of the island.
"I wonder how badly Edward wrecked the bedroom". He smirked as I cringed. The last thing I wanted to think about was my brother and sister in law having sex. I tried so desperately to block that out when Edward made the decision the first time.
I stuck out my tongue listening to Jasper's casual laugh.
We slowed beside the pier, Jasper instantly shutting off the boat and leaping out onto the dock with his hand extended toward me. "Miss Alice". He said with a polite bow as I grinned. Climbing to my feet on the seat, I curtsied dramatically.
"That's Mrs. Witlock sir". I said as his eyes flashed deviously.
"I appologize ma'am". He whispered taking my hand gracefully in his own.
I squealed unconciously as he pulled his arm back, my body tumbling forward into his open arms. "Now that wasn't very gentlemanly." I said striking his chest lightly.
"Once again I appologize. I couldn't resist". He said with a wink as he leaned around me to grab our bags.
"I'll let that one go". I whispered taking his hand as we walked down the pier onto the sand.
His fingers laced between mine, as his eyes turned down toward me. I beamed up at him as I skipped away, my bare feet brushing across the sand. Running toward the house, I smiled at the sound of his footsteps as he sprinted to my side. I froze beside the front door, a vision flashing in my mind as Jasper fished out the keys from his pocket.
"Anything we need to be concerned about"? He whispered to me as I blinked.
"No. Nothing critical". I said with a smirk as he pushed the door open.
He glanced around, his eyes falling back on me as he shrugged. "The foundation is still standing."
My eyes narrowed unconsciously as I shook my head. "Well we should be concerned if it wasn't, that'd mean Bella was probably dead as a result."
He laughed heartedly, his finger flicking on the light switch swiftly.
I blinked as the lights flickered on, the outline of several pieces of furniture draped in sheets appeared in front of us. Jasper walked ahead of me, dropping the bags beside the couch as he looked toward the bedroom. "Well he changed the bed". He noted softly as I placed my hands on my hips.
"Are you just gonna analyze our brother's honey moon the whole time we're here"?
I laughed as his head whipped around, his smirk reappearing. I smiled as he flashed to my side, his arms wrapping tightly around my waist.
"Course not." He whispered trailing his lips down the back of my neck. "Merely making an observation".
"Well observe something else". I whispered looking over my shoulder at him. I was for some reason finding it very difficult to look at him. Perhaps it was his soft lips making paths across my skin.
His eyes flickered up at me, his smile widening. "You look simply stunning." He whispered as I shook my head.
"Cheese ball". I laughed as he chuckled.
"So my compliments are a little dated, shoot me".
"I wouldn't dream of it". I whispered clenching the back of his head in my hands. Pulling his lips roughly against mine I felt his hands clench my hips. I spun around, my lips enveloping his as he pressed me backward against the counter. Raking my hands down his chest beneath his shirt, I listened to him growl. I gasped as he lifted me from the ground, laying me across the marble countertop.
"Carefully Jaz". I whispered pulling away from his lips to look into his eyes. "Esme would be upset if she had replace the countertops as well".
His lips curled up at the corners as he laughed. "Yes love". He muttered, plucking me from the countertop and carrying me toward the living room.
I gasped as he dropped to his knees, balancing over me as I laid on the wood. His arms flexed impressively as he leaned forward, capturing my frenziedly. As we rolled across the hard wood floor our hands ripping at each others clothes obsessively, the night flew by.
Finally taking a moment to breath, I curled up against his bare chest. He placed one arm around my shoulders, sliding his other hand beneath his head. We stared up at the ceiling silently as the sounds of the island filled the air.
"Something about this place." He muttered absentmindedly. "It seems to spark unrestrained lust." He whispered turning toward me.
Running my fingers through his hair, I shrugged. "Perhaps it is the moon."
He frowned, his brows pulling together. "But there is a moon in Forks. And yet I have never felt quite so devious as I do here". He smirked as he traced his fingers down my side.
"Lets just chock it up to the sea air". I said with another shrug as he laughed.
"Okay." He whispered glancing at the master bedroom. "Sorry Esme". He muttered quickly as I frowned.
"Wha-" I stammered as I was whipped from the ground into his arms as he sprinted toward the dark bedroom.
They sat at the table, her hand trailing over his broad shoulders. Jasper spoke to Emmett, trying desperately to ignore the soft touches of his mate. He tested the emotions of the room; irritation from a few near by girls, curiosity from others, lust directed at Rosalie. He shook his head, his hand capturing Alice's hand swiftly as he turned toward her.
Her bright smile fluttered, causing his stomach to bubble with lust. She blinked quickly, her long lashes fluttering as he smirked.
"So what you think"? Emmett said gruffly as he looked at Jasper.
"Sure. Anytime". Jasper muttered still looking over Alice's face.
Her hand snaked from his, her fingers tracing small circles around his cheek.
"Dammit". Emmett growled, his elbow thudding on the table as he leaned his chin in his palm. "I wish Edward would hurry up and get back. It's sickening watching you two all day".
Alice's eyes flickered casually to Emmett before turning to the dark haired girl watching them from across the cafeteria. "He will soon. Two more days. He just doesn't want her to be an issue anymore". She said turning back to Jasper, her legs draping over his thighs.
"Stupid human girl". Emmett frowned as Rosalie elbowed him lightly.
"It's so stupid. It shouldn't even be an issue." She hissed glaring back at Bella. "She's so.. Homely". Her eyes narrowed as she flipped her hair over her shoulder.
Alice smiled, her hands weaving through his hair, clenching loosely to the blond strands.
The bell rang in the distance and all the humans started filing out around them.
Alice frowned, her head bowing slightly as Jasper took her hand. "I suppose I better get to class." She whispered poking out her bottom lip.
"Oh waaaaa.." Emmett chimed. "One class to suffer through until you can get home and suck his face off." He laughed nodding to Jasper. "Come on Romeo, we got Chem".
Jasper smiled softly his hand cupping her cheek. "It's only an hour".
Alice sighed dramatically, her eyes turning up to the ceiling. "Alright," She said brightly, her lips pressing against Jasper's as she rose to her feet. "One hour". She whispered into his lips before pulling away.
Jasper blinked, a strong irresistible wave of lust emanating from Alice. Jumping to his feet, he reached out to her as she flitted quickly to the door.
"Come on you". Emmett said shoving a stack of books into Jasper's arms. "Today".
Jasper paused, his eyes shutting tightly as he shook his head. "Actually, I think I'm going to skip". He whispered looking back at the husky Cullen.
Emmett scoffed, his eyes rolling. "Cool. See you at home then". He said walking swiftly to join Rosalie at the door.
Jasper nodded, spinning on his heel and running in the opposite direction.
He sprinted around the back of the building, his eyes darting up toward the large windows high above.
"Come on and spike it"! A girl's voice echoed through the concrete as sounds of rubber squeaking across wood filled the air.
He smirked, leaping high into the air and catching the edge of the roof in his hand. Throwing himself backward, he crouched on all fours listening to the sounds inside the gym. Laying on his back with his hands behind his head, he proceeded to send waves of lust and ecstasy through the air.
This is wrong,
I should be gone.
Yet here we lay,
'Cause I can't stay away.
Alice froze, her hand in mid air as her body was hit with a spear of lust. Blinking quickly, she shook the feeling off, her hand striking the ball a little harder than intended. She cringed as several girls from the opposing team hit the ground to avoid the supersonic volleyball.
"Sorry," She whispered quickly as murmurers broke out amongst the group.
Her eyes trailed up the walls of the gym, taking in every bolt and grain of the wood. Shaking her head, she turned back toward the ball that was rolling across the ground toward her. As she knelt to pick it up, a wave of ecstasy hit her so hard she nearly fainted. Narrowing her gaze, she scanned the gym once more. Clenching her fist tightly, she hit the ball over the net as the other team raced to hit it.
She jumped as another wave of lust tumbled over her, causing her skin to prick and her palms to sweat. Damn Jasper, where are you? She thought, her eyes scrutinizing over the gym walls again.
She gasped as a feeling of love and passion enveloped her, throwing her off balance as she dove after the volleyball.
"Cullen?" The coach barked, her eyes narrowing. "What's the matter"?
Alice shook her head, her hand brushing over her forehead as she sighed. "Sorry." She whimpered closing her eyes. "I'm just feeling a little faint".
"Do you need to see the nurse"? She said as Alice nodded vigorously. "Very well, go then".
Alice walked slowly toward the locker rooms, her eyes turning toward the ceiling. Oh Jasper, you are going to get it..
Roses bloom,
In your dirty room.
I come to play,
'Cause I can't stay away.
No I can't stay away..
Jasper walked casually through the halls, using his gift on Alice smoothly. He listened to her grunt as she threw the door of the locker room backward.
"Oh Jaz.." She growled as he paused beside the door. "Don't come in here, there's another girl in here". She whispered as she walked past the lockers.
She looked around slowly, her eyes trailing up the walls. Standing beside her locker, she spoke to the empty air. "You are soo getting it when we get home. I know you're listening". She whispered as she pulled her white tank top over her head. "That little stunt was clever I'll give you that". She muttered removing her shoes quickly.
She smirked as the window above the toilet's creaked open, steady footsteps echoing across the tile floor.
"You are a terrible liar love." He said idly as he glided around the lockers.
"You don't know that Jaz. Another girl might have been in here. Her scent blocked by everything here, then what? You'd look pretty bad coming in her". She retorted, placing her hands firmly on her hips.
"Well I suppose I would have to apologize for doing this". He muttered clenching her back as he leaned forward. "But since there isn't anyone but you," His lips hovered over hers as she breathed heavily.
"You don't have to appologize". She said closing the space between them swiftly.
I'm conflicted,
I inhale now I'm addicted.
To this place,
To you babe,
I can't stay away.
Can't stay away.
We get up, we go down,
Then we go one more round.
It's wrong, they say,
I can't stay a- I can't stay away..
No I can't stay a- I can't stay away..
She wrapped her arms around his neck as his mouth covered hers. Pulling on the back of his hair, he kept his lips pressed into hers as they breathed in unison.
Jasper's hands trailed down her backside as he moaned softly into her lips. Clinging to her thighs, he drew her from her feet and thudded her back against the locker. Alice moaned, her lips pulling backward as his tongue glided down her neck. He pressed her roughly back into the locker as the metal creaked loudly.
"Someone will hear". She whispered into his ear, her lips grazing his skin.
Jasper chuckled, his hands floating over her hips toaward the straps of her bra. "And what will you have me do? Stop"?
I was numb,
For you I come.
Night and day,
And I can't stay away,
No I can't stay away.
Alice giggled, her head shaking back and forth as his lips touched against her collar bone. "No.. Why would I let you stop what you started"? She muttered, wrapping her legs around his hips.
"I started?" He said with an eyebrow raised as Alice nodded. "You're the one letting your emotions lure me here. You know I couldn't resist".
Alice nodded again, her chin leaning into the nape of his neck. "Yeah I know." She whispered tugging at the zipper of his jacket as she smiled.
Jasper smiled, shrugging out of the jacket and thrusting it into her open locker as he kissed her. He pressed his chest into her, keeping her against the lockers as he removed his shirt fluidly.
"Oooh.. Tempting Jaz.. You're not planning on something happening here are you"? She teased as he shrugged.
"Now you know I rarely plan anything when it comes to things like this".
"But you did plan that stunt in the gym". Alice said kissing his neck as his hands closed around back.
"True love. Very true".
I wish I could,
Leave and never return.
Baby, I know I should,
But for you I'd burn.
He kissed her lips, his tongue running along her teeth as her mouth parted.
Alice breathed against his lips, her hands flying over his bare chest as they kissed. Her eyes flashed open, turning toward the door. "Jaz". She whispered into his jaw as he followed her eyes.
"Right". He said quickly slamming the locker shut as he turned and sprinted toward the showers. Closing the opaque glass door as the door of the locker room swung open.
Alice gasped mutely as his lips pushed into her skin, his hands clenching her sides tightly. "Jasper". She whispered softly as he shook his head.
His chin tilted toward her face, his smile gleaming. "Sssh. Otherwise they'll know we're here". He said with a wink as she shook her head.
"You're something else". She muttered, her lips lowering toward his neck. Sucking and biting his skin, she listened to Jasper moan softly in her ear.
Stay away
'Cause I can't stay away.
His hands shot to her wrists, pressing them backward into the tile as his lips reached her lips once more.
The chatter of the girls in the locker room filled the air as Jasper and Alice moaned mutely in the shower.
Alice clenched his hair, jerking his head backward so she had better acess to his most vulnerable part of his body. Licking and kissing the sensitive skin behind his ear, she smiled at his stiffled moans. Wrapping her hands around his neck, she continued her teasing as the voices of the other girls grew nearer.
"Alice." Jasper moaned as his eyes flickered open and closed. "Please. I cannot take anymore of this, we have to-"
"No no Jaz.. You brought this on." She whispered slyly as she glanced down at the growing buldge in his jeans.
Jasper growled softly, pushing Alice back into the wall roughly. Stunned gasps echoed in the locker room as the florescent lights trembled.
"It's going to take alot more than that to make me stop Jaz". She whispered kissing her way down his chest as her fingers raked across his skin.
I'm conflicted,
I inhale now I'm addicted.
To this place,
To you babe,
Jasper clenched his mouth shut, his head rolling backward as Alice trailed kisses further down his body. He choked back a moan as her tongue slowly glided across the skin just above to top of his jeans. He watched her glide back toward his lips, her hands floating over his skin. Placing his hands on her hips, he pulled her roughly against him as he leaned back against the wall.
"What the heck"? A girl's voice chimed as the lights shook once more.
Jasper smirked as he leaned into Alice's lips, his hands closing firmly around the sides of her face. Opening his eyes, he stared down at her as she smiled.
I can't stay away.
Can't stay away.
We get up, we go down,
Then we go one more round,
It's wrong, they say.
I can't stay. I can't stay away,
Alice bit her lip, her brows rising as the bell rang and the girls hurried out of the locker room. Looking up at Jasper, she tilted her head to her side.
"We'll finish this at home little one". He whispered as she grinned, her arms circling his waist.
"Can't wait." She said as he touched his lips to her hand, leading her from the shower into the empty locker room..
No I can't stay. I can't stay away.
Jasper laid back on his bed, his hands folded under his head. The house was quiet, too quiet even for vampires. The usual mockings of Emmett, the soft hums of Esme, the clicking of piano keys by Edward. Nothing. Nothing but Alice's shuffling through her closet. She sifted through her clothes, examining each item silently.
"So where are you going"? Jasper muttered lazily as Alice looked up at him.
"Shopping with Edward and Bella". She said brightly.
Jasper groaned, his eyes rolling as he looked at the ceiling. "Is that so"?
"Yeah." She grinned, her hands closed around a grey sweater dress. "I'm going to restock their closet." She looked up at the ceiling of the closet, her gaze going blank.
Leaning up into a sitting position, Jasper watched her turn toward him with eyebrows raised. "That's interesting." She giggled as he frowned.
"What"? He whispered as she whipped off her dress, sliding the grey dress on fluidly.
"You'll see". She smirked as the front door opened, the scent of their siblings floating up the stairs. "We're here Bells". She grinned jogging toward him.
"Tell me what you saw". Jasper whispered wrapping his hands around her waist.
Alice smiled, her hand brushing across his cheek. Turning her head, she stared at the door as Bella stepped into the room.
"Hey." She said hesitantly, her eyes flashing toward Jasper.
Alice leaned forward, her lips pressing lightly to Jasper's. "Meet you downstairs". She sang dancing past Bella into the hall.
Jasper sat backward, his eyes turning slowly up to their newest sister.
Bella looked equally as uncomfortable as she shifted from foot to foot. After receiving a wave of calm from Jasper, she smiled pleasantly. "Jasper". She said softly, her eyes locking with his. She smiled hesitantly, biting lightly on her lower lip. "I need a favor."
Jasper tensed, his eyes turning toward the floor. "Yes Bella"? He muttered looking slowly back at her eyes.
Bella smiled lightly as she turned and stared at the closet. Taking a long breath, she spoke quickly. "I need you to watch Reneesme for a few hours".
"What"? Jasper said recoiling from her slightly. Sighing heavily, he shook his head. "Surely Bella there is someone better than me".
"Carlisle is at the hospital and Emmett, Esme and Rosalie are hunting."
"And Jacob"?
"At a pack meeting".
"Charlie"? Jasper said trying desperately to remember anyone in Forks more suitable for watching Reneesme than him.
Bella shook her head. "Please Jasper". She whispered looking at him from under her long eye lashes. "She thinks the world of you".
Jasper jumped to his feet, pacing the floor of the room. "Bella you know I would but.." He looked toward the ceiling, mentally searching his mind for an excuse. Finding nothing he let out a sigh."I'm not good with children".
Bella raised her eyebrows, her hand hanging on her hip. "Technically she has the mind of a teen by now."
Jasper tried again. "What if she gets bored"?
"Come one Jaz. I promise she won't be bothersome".
"It isn't that".
"Please". Bella smiled widely, bobbing up and down on her toes.
Jasper finally relented, his shoulders slumping. "Very well".
Bella clapped her hands together as she turned toward the door. "We'll be back in five hours". She said quickly before dashing down stairs.
"Five hours!?" Jasper called, running toward the staircase. He growled as Alice's porche's enguine roared, the tires screeching as they tore out of the driveway. He walked quickly down the staircase, Reneesme waiting for him at the bottom in a blue dress.
"Uncle Jaz". She said brightly leaping into his arms.
"Hey". Jasper muttered as she placed her hand against his cheek.
"Can I hear one of your stories"? She said as Jasper carried her into the living room.
"I think my stories are a bit gruesome for you". He smirked as Nessie frowned.
"Uncle Jaz". She groaned, folding her arms.
Jasper looked down at her as he sat in the armchair. "Maybe later".
"Fine". Reneesme said leaping off his lap and sprawling out on the floor.
"Did they give you anything to do"? he muttered leaning back in the chair.
Reneesme looked up at him brightly. "No.." She grinned. "Daddy said you'd entertain me".
Jasper frowned, his eyes narrowing as he turned toward the window.
"Ok uncle Jaz. How bout hide and seek"? She said jumping to her feet and clapping her hands. "I'll hide".
Jasper nodded, his hands pressing over his eyes. He jumped as Reneesme leaped onto his lap, her lips hovering over his knuckles.
"Don't peek, or I'll beat you up".
"I'm sure". He smirked as Reneesme flashed up the stairs.
Counting silently to ten, he jumped out of the chair, his eyes searching around the living room. "Oh Nessie". he called creeping slowly into the kitchen. As he listened to the still air of the house, he picked up a distinct fluttering heartbeat. Gliding up the stairs, he darted toward Carlisle's office. Pressing against the door, he listened to Reneesme's racing heart. "Oh Nessie". He whispered clenching the doorknob tightly.
He stepped into the study, his eyes trailing up the walls. Breathing steadily, he glided toward the desk.
"Nessie"? He whispered as a faint scratching echoed in the room. He smirked as a pair of tiny arms wrapped around his neck, Nessie's hot breath washing over his skin.
"Got you uncle Jazzy". She hummed in his ear as he glanced back at her.
"Jazzy"? He said, his eye brow raising.
"Aunt Alice calls you that doesn't she? I've heard her".
Jasper smiled, his hands wrapping around her small torso. "Yes little one she is the only one who calls me that. If you were someone else you'd probably get hit". He said holding her in front of him.
"Like uncle Emmett"? She smirked leaning her arms on his large hands. Looking into his amber eyes, she spoke slowly. "You guys play fight all the time. Will you teach me to fight"?
Jasper's expression hardened, his eyebrows furrowing. "No."
"But why"!? She chimed.
Jasper held her to his chest as he walked smoothly out of the room. "You don't want to fight." He whispered darkly as Nessie's eyes flashed over his many scars.
"You've fought lots haven't you"?
"Tons". Jasper said grimly as he glided down the steps.
"Is that before you met aunt Alice?"
"Very perceptive". He said turning into the kitchen and setting her on the counter. "You hungry"?
She nodded vigorously, her hand folding on her lap. "Mac and cheese please". She giggled as Jasper smiled.
"That much I can do." He said turning toward the cabinets they had stocked specifically for her. "You would think being a hundred sixteen years old my cooking skills would have improved. But sadly they have not".
Reneesme watched him silently as he filled a pot of water setting it on the stove. "Uncle Jaz". She whispered as he looked at her. "When were you born"?
He paused, his hand clenched loosely around a metal spoon. "That depends on what you interpretation of the word 'born' is".
She blinked slowly, her eyes turning toward the window. "Daddy says we're not born vampires. That we are made". She looked at him, her eyes glimmering with a perception far beyond her childlike appearance. "When were you made"?
Jasper stopped again, his eyes boring holes in the pot of water. "I don't think that is a very appropriate conversation".
"Please". She said softly, her eyes turned up at his face.
Jasper let out a sigh, his eyes flashing toward the fridge. "I was made by a woman named Maria. During the Civil War".
Her eyes widened, her mouth dropping open slightly. "Was she mean"? She whispered staring at his sullen expression.
Jasper closed his eyes, his hand stirring the spoon across the bottom of the pot. "Yes."
"Why did you stay with her"?
Jasper fell silent again, his chest rising as he breathed steadily. "She is very.. Persuasive." He looked up at her confused expression. "Not everyone has gifts that are harmless. Maria's was that you feel completely bound to her. She is the only one who exists, she becomes your world."
"And so you left"?
"Yes. With two others, Peter and Charolette."
"And then you made aunt Alice"?
Jasper nodded quickly, his mood brightening as he dropped the bag of macaroni into the pot. "Yes." He smiled lightly at her for the first time in their entire conversation. "I'm very grateful she found me".
"Me too". Nessie said brightly. "I missed you guys alot when you were gone".
Jasper smiled, his head turning down toward the pot. "We didn't want to leave, but we had to."
"I know". She watched him pour the pasta into a bowl, sprinkling the powder cheese over it.
He walked toward her smoothly, the metal bowl clenched in his hands. Scooping her from the counter, he leaned her against his hip as he walked into the living room. Placing her on the couch he flicked on the TV. "Uncle Jaz". Renesme said as he sat beside her. "Did you know Grandpa Charlie doesn't like you"?
Jasper laughed hearttedly as he leaned backward. "Yes. I've picked that up from the beginning."
"I heard Mommy talking about it once. He's scared of you. He thinks you are dangerous".
"That is true though".
"I don't think you're dangerous". She muttered scooping a spoonful of macaroni into her mouth.
"You only see one side." He whispered darkly staring at his scarred hands. "I've killed alot of people. Vampire and human alike."
Nessie remained unphased as he spoke so grimly. "Only because you had to."
"Yeah". he said staring at the TV.
"Aunt Alice said you don't like hurting people".
"That is true". He said slowly as she watched him silently.
Jasper stiffened as Reneesme scooted over on the couch, leaning into his side with the bowl on her lap. "At least you don't have to kill anymore. Grandpa Carlisle won't let you". Jasper nodded, his hand brushing over her hair.
"Only unless one of us is in danger".
Reneesme yawned, her tiny arms stretching into the air. "Yeah".
They fell silent as they watched TV, finally several hours later, Nessie fell asleep. Jasper leaned back on the couch, his head turned toward the ceiling, his eyes shut tightly. He jumped as a pair of lips pressed to his adam's apple, his eyes flashing open.
"Hey baby sitter". Alice said seductively as she leaned over the back of the couch.
Reaching his hand toward her slim face, he smiled.
"Was it as torturous as you thought?"
"I didn't say it would be torturous for me. I was thinking about her sake."
"Why? You're a great baby sitter". She said jumping onto the arm of the couch.
"With the exception of being a monster". He muttered stroking her cheek.
"Oh stop." She said as Bella and Edward walked in the door.
"Thanks Jaz". Edward muttered looking at the sleeping child.
"Yeah."
Bella strode into the room, her eyes on the large mixing bowl on Nessie's lap. "Gueez Jaz, a bit much. What is that? The whole box"?
His eyes flickered down to the bowl and then back at Bella. "She could stand to gain a few pounds".
Edward smiled, collecting the sleeping child into his arms. "Ah. No harm done''. Looking at Bella, he smiled. "Shall we take the stuff home"?
Bella nodded as she appeared at Jasper's side, her hand gliding through his hair. "Thanks again Jaz".
Jasper shrugged as the two disappeared out the window. Looking up at Alice, she watched her slide onto his lap. Wrapping his arms around her waist, he leaned his head against hers. "No wonder you were laughing earlier."
"I knew you'd do fine". She whispered, her hands snaking around his neck. "Perhaps you should go pro. You can watch all the vampire/ human hybrid children". She giggled as he frowned.
"Let's not and say we did." He whispered pressing his lips into hers.
It had been three months since the diner, and meeting Alice. Three months since my life drastically changed.
I never knew such peace in my entire existance. I never felt the need to smile so often as I did when I was with her. Alice. So pure. So sweet and kind. There were so many things for one to love about her. From her bubbly optimistic attitude, to her ever present smiles, to how beautiful she looked when she stared up through her long lashes.
I shook my head roughly. Alice was consuming my thoughts far too often. Surely this was not appropriate considering I barely knew her. What would she say if I told her I thought of her so often. How my mind wandered into fanatsies about her at any given moment. Surely she would be offended.
We walked through the forest, the moon light shining through the bare trees onto the grass below our feet. Alice had her hand wrapped tightly around my forearm, her eyes flickering up at me every few moments. If I were still alive I would have blushed. What could she possibly see that would make her look upon me so often? It couldn't be my looks, no definetely not that. What with all the many cresent shaped scars littering my skin. A constant reminder of my dark past. No. There had to be something else she saw. But what?
I slid my hands in my pockets, unintentionally brushing her hand across my ribs as I did. Her eyes turned to me again, her smile bright as she looked up at me.
"You're eyes are lightening". She said brightly as I nodded.
My eyes, once dark crimson orbs were now fading into a brownish yellow. They would never be as prestine and beautiful as Alice's. And I would never be as pure as her.
"That is good. I suppose".
"It is. I saw us finding the Cullen's when your eyes were amber". She grinned at her feet.
"Have you seen anything else of them"?
Her head shot back up as she smiled wider. "They're in Alaska, with another group of vegetarians". She giggled softly. "They're a covent of mostly women, one of the girls likes Edward".
"Our soon to be brother"? I asked as she nodded quickly.
"Yeah. Edward has no interest though". She smiled up at the path we were walking on. "I suppose he just hasn't found the right person yet".
I nodded slowly, my eyes turning toward the sky. I could definetely relate to Edward. So long I felt lost in the world, unable to find the piece my heart lacked. I felt complete with Alice, though she wouldn't know it. The more I thought of my growing feelings for Alice, the more uncomfortable I became.
Alice seemed to enjoy my company, though I rarely spoke. But that couldn't be love. She wouldn't feel such a thing for me.
I sighed, Alice's eyes turned toward me quickly.
"Is something the matter"? She whispered, her hand tightening on my arm.
My skin pricked with electricity as she touched me, shaking my head slowly I glanced down at her. "No. I'm alright".
Alice nodded, her eyes turning back toward the trees. "We should be somewhere near Victoria". She noted softly.
Staring over her short hair and narrow face, I felt myself being pulled toward her.
Alice had such a grasp on my body, more so than even Maria. Everything about her drew me toward her. Her eyes, her tiny hands, her lips. I snapped back, my eyes quickly turning toward the sky.
I needed to stop thinking about her like that. Somehow I needed to control myself.
Alice deserved the best parts of me. True she deserved my attention, but not a growing obession. Even though I gave up my whole previous existance, placing my life in the hands of a woman I barely knew. Betting everything on a future that she had foreseen. But it didn't matter. Alice was here, and hopefully she'd stay with me forever. If she wanted to of course.
Desperate for changing
Starving for truth
Closer where i Started
Chasing after you
I sucked in a deep breath, the scents of the forest flowing into my nostrils. Pine, soil, lilac, deer, mice.. Something else. Charcoal, sweat, and human blood.
Alice had smelt this as well, her eyes widening as she tightened her grip on my arm. "Jasper do you know what that is"?
"No". I whispered looking down at her as she grinned.
"Try harder, focus".
Easier said than done with her here. I closed my eyes, my nostrils flaring as I breathed deeply. Different scents met me this time. Animals; Elephants, lions, and bears. People; Women, men, children. My throat burned as I attempted to focus.
"What is that"? I said opening my eyes and looking down at Alice.
"Come on. I'll show you". She smiled, her fingers weaving into mine as she broke into a sprint.
I'm falling even more in love with you,
letting go of all i've held onto.
I'm standing here until you make me move,
I'm hanging by a moment here with you.
The trees flashed by as we ran, miles flying beneath our feet. Finally the forest broke, a strange sight opening up to us in a large clearing beside the road.
My eyes widened as I took in the entire scene. A strange giant, wheel like thing stood thirty feet tall, people sitting in small benches on it. A giant tent stood a few feet away, the concentration of the animal's scents focused there. Wooden booths with crowds of people gathered in front of them with brightly colored signs. And there were trucks with lines of people standing in front of them buying hot dogs and other snacks.
Alice spun toward me, her hand clenching my other hand as she looked up at me.
"Do you know what this is"? She said bouncing up and down excitedly.
I shook my head dumbly. I never seen such a strange spectacle.
"It's a carnival!" She chimed, nearly jumping out of her skin with anticipation. "You've never been to one"?
I shook my head again, my eyes turning down to her. "No. Peter, Charolette and I usually avoided places with lots of people. It was too tempting."
"Well come on". She sqeaked tugging on my hand.
I remained frozen, my years of self evaluation told me not to move. She looked up at me, her brows pulled together. "I- I cannot Alice." I stammered looking down at her. "It has been to soon. I don't think I am ready, what if something happens". My hands began to tremble as the reality of my frailty sunk in. I wasn't ready to be surrounded my hordes of humans pulsing with fresh blood. It was far too tempting.
Alice squeezed my hand tightly, her eyes locking into mine. I knew then there was no point in arguing with. "Don't worry Jasper. Nothing will happen." Her hand released my hand as she grabbed my arm. "I won't let anything happen to you". She smiled brightly up at me as I nodded slowly. Falling into step with her, we entered the strange 'carnival'.
Forgetting all I'm lacking,
completely incomplete.
I'll take your invitation
you take all of me.
We walked down the dirt path between the booths, my eyes flashing wildly at every human that passed. Alice's hand remained closed tightly on my arm as her other hand interlaced with mine. I looked down at her as we passed a crowd of people watching a man swallow a sword. Gasps and murmurs swept through the crowd as waves of concern and shock hit me.
I tightened my grip on Alice's hand as we passed a group of young girls. I held her tiny hand in a vice grip as I tried to surpress the burning in my throat.
"Good Jasper. You're doing great". She said warmly as she looked up at me.
Now.. i'm falling even more in love with you,
letting go of all i've held onto.
I'm standing here until you make me move,
i'm hanging by a moment here with you.
"Come on, let's have fun". She said leading me toward the tent full of animals.
As we sat on the steel benches under the big top. Elephants painted with flowers and clouds were strolled out in front of the crowd. Clowns and girls in brightly colored dresses danced in the center ring. I froze as they brought out the lion, the crowd gasping as a man in a red suit taunted the beast.
I stiffened as Alice curled up next to me, her arm wrapping around my waist as she leaned her head against my shoulder. Carefully lifting my arm, I draped it over her shoulder as she grinned happily. I felt myself smiling as well as I felt happiness and contentment flowing freely from her.
This was the thing I was missing all my life. Her. Alice. My missing piece. If I had no other reason to exist on this earth but Alice, I was content with that. She understood me and liked being with me. She made me happy and at ease. I could very well get used to this for the rest of our endless lives.
I'm living for the only thing i know,
i'm running and not quite sure where to go.
I don't know what i'm diving into,
just hanging by a moment here with you.
The show ended with a 'death defying' dive from one of the clowns on a twenty foot high platform, into a pool of water. As we walked out of the tent, Alice wrapped both arms around my waist, her head leaning against my chest.
Everything seemed to be right. I was no longer bothered by the smell of blood of the humans passed me. I didn't feel a need to drain a passing child or the beasts in the cages in the tent. Though it hadn't been long that I started living my live with renewed optimisium, I still felt at peace. It was almost as if nothing could blot out the constant ray of sunshine in my arms.
There's nothing else to lose,
nothing left to find.
There's nothing in the world,
that could change my mind.
There is nothing else
there is nothing else...
"Is there anything you want to do"? Alice said looking up at me warmly.
My eyes flickered away to the giant wheel glowing against the dark night sky.
"That's a Ferris wheel, I haven't been on one as a vampire. Though I'm not sure if I've been on one as a human either.. And you haven't been on one at all, so maybe we can try"? She stared into my eyes with the same look she had given me earlier. That look would be troublesome down the road, as it could make me do whatever she wanted. But for now I didn't mind.
"Alright. Let's try". I said taking her hand tightly in my own as we walked in the direction of the 'Ferris Wheel'.
Desperate for changing,
Starving for truth.
Closer where i Started,
Chasing after you.
Alice danced her way in front of me, her hand fishing inside of her coat pocket. Handing the man a coin, she dragged me toward one of the benches.
I eyed it wearily. It didn't look all too safe. Though being a vampire I didn't fear death, much less a fall from thirty feet, what concerned me was Alice. What if something went wrong and she fell off. She wouldn't be able to protect herself using her vampire abilities, and I wouldn't be able to do something that might expose us. The idea was too hard to think about.
Climbing onto the bench beside her, I opened my arm as she leaned against me.
I'm falling even more in love with you,
letting go of all i've held onto.
I'm standing here until you make me move,
i'm hanging by a moment here with you.
The wheel began to steadily move, our seat climbing higher and higher into the air. I squeezed Alice's shoulder as the ground faded beneath us. Though the height was not a problem, I still clung to her protectively. If she noticed she didn't say anything, just merely kept smiling.
Looking over the edge of the rail, my heightened senses allowed me to see farther than the humans. The forest looked so large and dense, hard to believe that we were just strolling through it. Well, hard to believe for a human.
"It's beautiful". Alice whispered, her hand resting against my stomach.
I glanced down at her, her pink lips just a few inches from my own. Dammit! My mind was going there again! It was not proper to think of Alice such a way when we were not even married. And how could I ask her to marry me after just three months?
She smiled up at me, her fingers pressing into my stomach.
Letting out a sigh, I lifted my hand. Without thinking, I pressed my fingers against her cheek, gently sweeping back the hair from her face. "Thank you for staying with me." I muttered aimlessly, being so lost in her eyes I let myself ramble. "I know it cannot be easy traveling with a lost cause".
Im living for the only thing i know,
i'm running and not quite sure where to go.
I don't know what i'm diving into,
just hanging by a moment here with you.
Alice frowned, her lower lip pushing out as she shook her head. "You're not a lost cause".
"I'm no good at this thing. Every human I pass I want to kill". I sighed, my eyes turning toward my feet. "Only when I'm near you do I feel something other than thirst."
What was wrong with me? Was there no filter left on my brain? Words just kept spilling over my lips like water in a river. I had to monitor what I say lest I say too much.
"What is that"? She whispered, her hand gliding up my chest.
I quivered as her fingers moved up my chest toward my neck. Blinking quickly, I shook away the mental image that was unfolding in my mind.
Alice's eyes widened, her gaze breaking mine as she looked away.
Dammit! That's what happened when you didn't control your emotions. God, what could my emotions have revealed to her?
Her eyes turned back to mine quickly as she smiled.
Just hanging by a moment..
"Alice I-" I began yet lost my train of thought when she looked at me.
"It's okay Jaz. I know you'll tell me when you feel ready." She whispered leaning backward away from me.
My eyes remained on her face as she brushed her fingers across the top of my hand. Unable to find the filter, I spoke quickly.
"Alice, when I'm with you I feel a peace I have never known." She looked up at me, her face a blank mask of mild interest. "I-I don't really know what this is or what you see in me but-" I grunted to myself as she giggled. I was rattling on like an ignorant hick, I had to get my thoughts in order. "I- I don't ever want to be apart from you. When I'm with you I don't feel like such a- a.." I paused taking a long breath. "A monster".
Hanging by a moment..
Alice looked up at me silently, her eye lashes fluttering as she blinked. She raised her hand, her fingers brushing lightly through my hair.
For some reason her touch invoked an animalistic lust inside of me. Something about her skin brushing against mine, drove my mind into dangerous territory. Looking down at her silently, I prayed she hadn't felt my growing lust.
"Jasper you're not a monster. You never have been". I opened my mouth to protest but she placed her finger against my lips. The lust bubbled to the surface as my mind swirled inside my skull. "You've lived a difficult life, I will never know such a life.. But I know what the future holds for you. You are a good person, a good friend, a loyal companion-" Her voice trailed off as she whispered the last words. "A wonderful lover." She snapped her eyes back to my face as she smiled. "Never in my visions have I seen you as a monster. Even when I awoke and your face was the first thing I saw."
Her fingers trailed along my cheek as I shuttered.
"Your heart is pure Jasper. I know it". Her fingers rested against my collar bone as she fell silent.
My mind went black as I leaned foward, my fingers pressing against the underside of her chin. I watched her eyes flash up at me, curiosity flickering through them. Closing my eyes, I lowered my lips toward hers.
Hanging by a moment...
It was soft at first, a quick brush as our lips met. A spark traveled through her lips into my body, awakening every nerve. I jumped as her arms wrapped around my neck, her hands tugging on my hair forcefully. She pulled me roughly against her lips, her mouth opening as we crashed into each other. My hand snapped up from my side, closing around the back of her head and pulling her lips deeper into mine.
This is what I missed all my life. It was different from the kisses I shared with Maria. Soft, pure, lust bubbling beneath the surface but above all beautiful. Alice would be all I would need ever, I knew it instantly.
As we parted, I stared down into those perfect orbs I watched so often. This was my place. My home. This is where I needed to be. In her eyes... Forever....
Hanging by a moment here with you..
Alice sat in the living room with Charlie and Bella, the other Cullens lingering around the house. The elder swan looked from his daughter to his surrogate one sitting in the arm chair across from him. She was louging in the chair, her finger curling lazily around a strand of her hair as she stared at the ceiling. Bella was watching him carefully, making sure his stares didn't last too long.
Alice's eyes seemed to go blank as they usually did, as if her mind were a TV and someone changed the channel and made the screen static. She blinked quickly, her smile appearing on her slim face.
Charlie jumped as an eerie prescence entered the room. Tall, blond, thin like a swimmer, one of the older Cullen's glided into the room.
Charlie watched silently as the boy flashed a nervous smile at him before appearing at Alice's side. He leaned over the back of the chair, his hands tracing down Alice's shoulder as she beamed up at him.
"Where you going love"? She whispered softly as he leaned around the chair to kneel in front of her.
"Emmett and I are going for a drive". He said lightly, his fingers brushing across the top of her head. "Be back in oh say, two hours." He grinned at her as Alice placed her hands on his shoulders.
"Okay. Don't get into trouble". She said with a wink as Jasper smiled, his lips pressing firmly into hers.
Charlie tensed as he passed, the cool aura surrounding him leaving the room as he disappeared.
Charlie loved most of the Cullens, Carlisle was a trusted member of the community of couse. Edward, well he had his reservations for different reasons that pertained to his daughter and grand daughter. Esme was a dream, so kind and sweet. Emmett, well he was like most of the troublesome kids in Forks. Rosalie, a bit stuck up yet still polite toward him. Then there was Jasper.
There was just something about him he didn't trust. Some dark intention lurking behind his glassy yellow eyes. Something seemed sinsiter about him, as if he were hiding some dark secret. Not to mention he seemed so old. The way he talked 'Yes sir'. 'No ma'am' it was too polite. He liked manners as much as the next person but this kid acted as if he were from a different time period. And the way he hung onto Alice was definetely disturbing. Clinging to her like a possession. It was unnatural, even for teens in love, someone could not be as possesive as him. Acting as if he'd rip someone's head off if someone touched her.
He heard Edward snicker from the kitchen as he played with Reneesme.
Looking back at Alice he cleared his throat. He debated if it were appropriate to question their relationship in thier own home. Sure they were now his inlaws yet it was definetely a personal matter.
He caught a glimpse of Bella eyeing him as he looked at Alice.
"Alice". He said as she looked up at him quickly.
"Yes Charlie"? She sang as he shifted in the chair, leaning his elbows on his knees.
"How does all this work? This whole.. Pairing off thing? Like you and Jasper, it's like you two are connected at the hip."
"Among other things". Edward called from the kitchen as he chuckled.
"Dad". Bella said sternly as she floated toward the couch. "Is this gonna become an interrogation"? She said with narrowed eyes.
"No Bells". He said waving his hand as her face remained skeptical.
"Bella. Let Charlie say what he has to". Alice said lightly from the chair.
Charlie cleared his throat again, his hands folding under his chin. "It's just like.. Everyone here is.. Together".
Edward chuckled again as he walked into the room with Reneesme on his hip.
Alice smiled casually. "Well kind of. We're very close".
"I didn't mean in that way."
"Dad". Bella said as he waved her off.
"I mean how did this happen? Everyone paring off".
Bella rolled her eyes as she leaned her head into her hand. "Oh god dad"!
Alice laughed softly. "Well Charlie. We've all kind of grown up with each other."
"I know that. You guys haven't dated other people? Only each other"? He cringed as he said the last part of the sentence.
"Oh we've dated other people. Jasper was with this girl Maria for a while. I met her". She said lightly as she looked at the ceiling. "It just didn't work out being with other people."
"Well I can understand that but.." Charlie blushed slightly as Bella groaned. "I mean it's just.. You guys are so.. so serious. It's like you all are already married. I mean I'm not one to talk I was married young too but..." He rambled on as everyone watched him silently. "You've got to experience other people before you get so intensely involved with someone-"
"Dad"! Bella barked. "That's totally innappropriate"!
Alice laughed again, her hand raised into the air. "Let him speak Bella, he is your father. He can have an opinion. I value his opinion as I do Carlisle's" She looked back athim smoothly. "You were saying"?
Charlie started fidgeting with his hands, motioning out his thoughts. "I mean, you two. How long have you guys been together anyway"?
Alice smiled, biting lightly on her lip. "A while. It feels like I've known him my whole life."
"Exactly, you've never thought of being with someone else? Even dating another guy"?
Alice looked at the ceiling, her eye lashes batting gracefully. "Not really. Jasper was my first. I never really thought of anyone else as I have him. He's everything to me. I love him".
Charlie frowned, his point was obviously not getting through to her. "Well I mean that's fine but.. he's.. interesting". He said gruffly as Bella groaned.
"You've got that right". Edward muttered as Reneesme touched his cheek.
"I mean.. No offense".
"None taken. Jasper is odd. He's like no one I've ever met and ever will meet. He's the one person who can still surprise me".
Edward snickered as Charlie sighed.
"Well.. That's my opinion". Charlie said as Alice smiled graciously. "But honestly.. Carlisle doesn't let you all be intimate with each other here does he"?
"Okay dad I think that's quite enough"! Bella said leaping to her on his arm, she yanked him to his feet. "I told you no interrogating so I think it's time to go!"
"Bells, I didn't mean offense-"
"Save it dad it's too late now"! Bella said shoving on his back, pushing him toward the door.
"Alice I appologize if I was too forward"! He called over his shoulder as Bella pushed him onto the porch.
"No problem Charlie"! Alice yelled as Bella pulled Charlie into his cruiser and started the enguine.
"Well that was interesting". Edward said as the car screeched out of the driveway.
Alice giggled, folding her legs on the chair. "Everyone's allowed to have their opinion."
"Even if you won't listen to it". Edward said sliding into Charlie's empty chair.
"Exactly". She whispered turning toward the window as Jasper leaped into the room. "Come here Jazzy". She sang as she hugged him tightly.
"Jasper I have to go"! Alice yelled, her eyes pouring invisible tears. "Bella might be hurt, or dead"!
"How do you know she's dead Alice"? Jasper said sternly, his arms folded tightly over his chest.
"I just do Jaz, what do you think would happen if she jumped off a cliff? She's not in the right state of mind!"
"Alice she's survived this long, why would she kill herself now"?
"I don't know Jaz. What if Edward was wrong? What if she couldn't move on? What if-"
Jasper grabbed her shoulders firmly his eyes burning into hers. "Alice listen to yourself. 'What if'. What if you're blowing this whole thing out of proportion? She's probably fine".
"Jasper she's not. I know she's not". She squeezed his wrists, staring weakly into his eyes. "Please Jaz. Two days."
"No Alice. No we promised". He said coldly.
"Jaz please. Two days."
"We can't! We promised Edward". He said shaking his head.
"Jasper". She whispered touching her hand against his cheek. "Please".
He stared at her for a long moment, his eyes unwavering. "I won't break a promise I have made."
"You don't have to Jaz. Two days I promise and I will be right back". Her hand closed around his cheek as he sighed.
"Alice I don't want you to go alone." He whispered closing his eyes and leaning into her small hand.
"Two days. I promise." She whispered leaning up to kiss his lips. "Come what may Jaz".
Jasper wrapped his arms around her small body, crushing her against his chest as he lifted her off the ground. "Two days."
"Two days". She muttered kissing his pale cheek.
This time, This place.
Misused, Mistakes..
Too long, Too late..
Who was I to make you wait?
Jasper sat on the bed, his body frozen in place for several hours. He hadn't moved since she'd last called, the last time he heard her voice. Her lovely voice that he might not ever hear again because she was going to face the most formidable foe.
And here he was, hopelessly trapped in his room, bound to a promise that he wouldn't follow her. He was an idiot.
He growled loudly, his hand nearly crushing the tiny phone.
Alice. He was such an idiot to let her go alone. He should have known better. He should have done something more.
He closed his eyes imagining his mate's perfect face. "Two days. I promise". Dammit. He couldn't just stay here and do nothing.
He needed to be with her. He had to see her face. He needed to get out of this house and go be with the one he loved. He was wasting precious time by just sitting here. Alice was his world, without her- He shuttered at the thought. He couldn't imagine a life without Alice. To even entertain the idea sent shivers down his spine.
It was too horrible a reality to think about. Without her, he would plunge back into darkness and violence. Or perhaps he would go the route of Edward and kill himself. That would be the 'heroic' thing to do.
Just one chance.
Just one breath.
Just in case there's just one left.
'Cause you know,
you know, you know..
He growled louder, slamming his fist into his forehead. The door creaked open a sliver, Esme peering silent at him.
She floated toward the bed, sitting beside him soundlessly. Wrapping her arms around his shoulders, she leaned her head against his back. "She will be alright."
How could she know? How could any of them know? It'd been hours since he'd heard from her last. How were they to know if Edward were even alive? Or if the Volturi got all of them and already killed them.
He shuttered again and Esme tightened her grip. "She is strong." She whispered into his ear. "Edward won't let her linger, he would send her away if it came down to it."
"Yeah". Jasper muttered as Carlisle glided into the room. Rosalie and Emmett followed closely behind, falling into sitting positions on the floor.
Alice was his world. She needed to make it out of this. Esme had to be right for his sanity. He loved Alice with every fiber, cell, drop of blood in his entire body. She needed to be with him now. To be the tourniquet on his heart.
That I love you..
I have loved you all along,
And I miss you..
Been far away for far too long.
I keep dreaming you'll be with me,
and you'll never go.
Stop breathing if,
I don't see you anymore.
His mind wandered into memories, precious memories he would take with him to the grave if she were gone. Their first kiss. Their first meeting in the diner. Her arms wound around his waist. Her face against his chest as they laid in the snow. Her hand in his. Thier lips pressed against each other. If tears could come from his eyes they'd be falling in sheets.
He stared down at the phone, his heart calling to whatever God that had the power to make it ring. Whom would bring his Alice back to him so he were whole again. If there were such a god out there, he needed to hear his prayers.
He sighed, his eyes dancing across the blank screen. Nothing. How long would he have to suffer? Would he even know if she disappeared from the world? Of Course he would, because half his heart would go with her. And then he would march into Volturra and demand they kill him as well. Expose their kind, kill thousands, anything needed to reunite him with his Alice. He was just as stupid as Edward in that sense.
On my knees, I'll ask,
Last chance for one last dance.
'Cause with you, I'd withstand,
All of hell to hold your hand.
I'd give it all,
I'd give for us.
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know...
Hours ticked by yet still nothing. Just as he was about to give up hope and crush the phone into dust, it rang. Everyone's head shot up as he snapped the phone to his ear desperately screaming into it.
"Alice"? He whispered as it remained silent.
"Jasper". She said after a long pause.
His dead heart fluttered as her voice trailed into his ear. "Where are you? Are you alright? Where is that jack as-"! He said hurriedly as she giggled softly.
"Jaz. Jaz it's alright. He's here. You can kill him when we get home. We're all fine".
He breathed a long sigh, his sigh melding with the sighs of his family members.
"Jaz". She said hesitantly as he snapped back to reality.
"Yes love". He said softly.
"I love you Jasper. I'm so sorry." She whimpered as he closed his eyes smiling.
"It matters not. Just get back to me alright"?
"Yes. I'll see you in Forks. I love you".
"I love you too Alice". He said cradling the phone as it fell silent.
So far away.
Been far away for far too long.
So far away.
Been far away for far too long.
But you know, you know, you know.
The car, the plane, nothing went fast enough for him. He wanted to be with her now, he wanted to hold her. He wanted to crush Edward's jaw for being so rash and stupid. He wanted to kiss his lovely Alice above all else. His lips felt empty without hers against it.
They waited in the terminal at the airport, humans trickling past them.
Carlisle and Esme spoke quietly as Rosalie clung to Emmett.. Jasper's arms were the only ones that were empty. But not for long.
His eyes scanned the terminal, dancing across each face that passed. He flicked his wrist toward his eyes, glancing at the still hands. Soon.. Soon she would be with him. Soon he would be whole again. He looked up as the clock chimed, his entire body quivering with anticipation. Turning toward the gates, he watched the passengers glide through the double doors. He looked over their heads, betwen their bodies, under thier arms for a glimpse of his little pixie. He grinned as he saw her short black hair bobbing through the crowd. Opening his arms, he watched her sprint toward him frantically.
I wanted,
I wanted you to stay.
'Cause I needed,
I need to hear you say.
That I love you,
I have loved you all along..
She crashed into him, her head thudding against his marble chest. Her hands clawed at him furiously as she stared up at him with a grief stricken face.
"Jaz". She choked, her hands grabbing around the back of his belt.
Jasper said nothing as he lifted her into his arms crushing his lips against hers. Her hands weaved into his hair as she pressed herself into his lips. Breathing in her scent, he sighed heavily.
She was here. He was whole again.
And I forgive you,
For being away for far too long..
So keep breathing..
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore,
Believe it.
Hold on to me and, never let me go..
"I love you". She cried squeezing his coat as he smiled.
"It goes without saying I love you". He whispered, leaning his lips against her forehead. His arms crushed her small body to him, refusing to let her go for anyone or anything. The others could wait till they got home to hug Alice, but this moment was his. Alice was with him and he wasn't going to stop holding her. He wouldn't let their hands be apart for more than a moment. He suffered through an eternity with her away. He wasn't going to miss a single second.
Keep breathing..
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore..
Believe it,
Hold on to me and, never let me go..
"Jasper I'm so-" She began as he pressed his finger onto her lips.
"I forgive you". He muttered closing his eyes. Digging his nails into her jacket, he smiled as her hands clenched to his shirt. Looking down at her yellow eyes, he smiled widely. "Let's go home love". He whispered looking at the others. Trailing a few feet behind them as they walked to the car, he never relented his vice grip on Alice. He would never let her go. Never again, no matter the circumstances. If it meant he'd lost his life to be with her then so be it. They were going to be together no matter what. He would never doubt her again. Regardless.
Keep breathing,
Hold on to me and, never let me go..
Pressing his chin onto the top of her head, he closed his eyes. Come what may he would be at her side.
I sat on the couch beside the window, my hand pressed against the cold glass. I looked over the trees in the courtyard, bare branches like long fingers stretching toward the sky. A scream came from down the hall as the orderlies raced to attend to the girl. I shuttered as her screams continued, finally dying away as they restrained her to the bed. This place, it reeked with such evil and sadness. The souls of the committed crying out to be away from this place. My soul perhaps called the loudest.
It wasn't fair. I wasn't evil or cruel, I didn't try to hurt myself or others like some of the patients here. I didn't need to be here. My eyes widened as another strange dream flashed in my mind.
"Alice". The boy said, his yellow eyes turning down toward me. His hand stroked my cheek as I leaned toward him.
Alice. He called me Alice and not Mary. How strange. I quivered as his hand trailed down my collar bone.
"Jasper stop". I smiled swatting his hand away.
"I apologize ma'am". He whispered, his glorious smile flashing across his face.
I blinked as the dream faded, my hand quivering on the glass. I still didn't know who this man was and how he knew me. But he was so beautiful I didn't care. I had many strange dreams, but the ones with him in it were the greatest.
"Mary". The red headed orderly Victoria leaned toward me. She was a sickening woman despite the facade she put on. I knew she abused patients here, even if the others weren't aware of it. "Let's go talk with Dr. Kerrigan". She whispered tugging on my hand, her cat like eyes flashing darkly.
I jumped to my feet, my hand snapping out of her grasp.
Her eyes narrowed darkly as she glared at me. "Come on then". She hissed turning her back toward me.
Another orderly glided to my side, this one a man named Johnathon. He was much kinder. "How are you doing Mary"? He said kindly, his large hand clapping on my shoulder.
I nodded mutely, my eyes on the ground. Again my mind was consumed with another dream. I saw nothing as we walked through the halls toward Dr. Kerrigan's office. John's hand closed around my arm as he pulled me into a large white room, a chair sitting in the center, another one against the wall. My vision cleared as he pushed me into the chair, his hands flickering over the restraints on the arms. Securing them around my wrists, he took a step backward. "It's just a precaution Mary". He said smoothly as he floated back toward the door.
I looked up at the glass window, Victoria's dark eyes boring holes into my face. Evil bitch.
I sighed as Dr. Kerrigan entered the room a moment later, sitting silently in the chair opposite of me. He studied me from behind his thick glasses. "Hell Mary." he muttered, his pen drumming against his clip board.
I remained silent, my mouth clamped tightly shut. I wasn't crazy. There was no reason I needed to speak to this shrink. It didn't matter what I said, he'd still think I was insane.
He cleared his throat, his thick mustache quivering. "How are the episodes Mary? Have you had any recently?"
I still didn't speak.
He nodded slowly, the tip of his pen sweeping across the page. "Ms. Brandon, you need to cooperate".
I shook my head, my short hair brushing across my cheeks. "I'm not crazy". I muttered to the wall.
"No one said that you were." He spoke softly, his pen flickering over the paper again.
"Obviously you think I am if I'm here, if my parents dumped me off here and didn't bother with me anymore. Obviously somethings wrong with me right?!" I snapped at him, my wrist pressing into the leather restraint.
He remained stoic as he stared at me. "You are here because of psycotic episodes Ms. Brandon. Always rattling on about your dreams is the reason your parents asked me to see you".
I blinked as my vision darkened, another dream enveloping me.
A dark forest loomed in front of me, the trees menacing looking as I lay on the ground. I looked over my shoulder, a blonde haired boy, different from the one in my previous dreams stood a few feet away tearing something apart. He growled deeply, his hands shreding whatever it was to pieces. Throwing it toward the ground, he glared back at me. His red eyes flashed wildly as he hissed. "Dammit.. What a waste". He muttered stomping off into the trees.
I screamed, my eyes turning down to my chest. A red cresent mark stood above my breast, the fire I felt beneath my skin coming from that spot. I screamed and rolled in the snow, my body quivering wildly.
I gasped as the white room appeared, Dr. Kerrigan leaning toward me in his chair.
"Did you have another vision"? He asked, his pen poised ready.
Shaking my head, I stared at the wall.
He shook his head as he leaned backward. "Very well then".
"Someone is going to kill me." I muttered toward the ground as his eyebrows raised.
"What was that"? He whispered casually as my anger burned.
"Someone is going to kill me! In the forest! A blond boy"! I lurched in the chair as he trembled. "He's going to kill me! I saw it"!
"Ms. Brandon this is the reason you are here. Do you really believe someone is after you"?
"Yes! Yes of course! I saw him!" I screamed, my head shaking back and forth.
Kerrigan shook his head, his hand waving through the air.
"You have to believe me please!" I watched weakly as he drifted from the chair, the clip board under his arm.
"Take care of her". He whispered to Victoria as she and several orderlies entered the room.
"He'll kill me! He will I know it"! I screamed as Kerrigan turned his back on me and disappeared out the door.
"Ms. Brandon stop this". John said clenching my arms. "Just relax."
"Please, please John. I swear I'm not lying." I begged, tears rolling down my cheeks as I looked at him. "Please".
He shook his head silently as he looked up at Victoria. I glanced at Victoria as she reached into her coat, pulling out a long needle.
"Please John I'm telling the truth, I saw it".
"It's alright Ms. Brandon just stay still".
Victoria's cold fingers closed around my forearm as she leaned toward me.
"Get away from me devil"! I screamed at her as she glared at me. "Don't you dare touch me bitch"! She shook her head, the tip of the needle plunging into my arm as I screamed.
I laid on my bed, my eyes flickering open slowly. The room was dark, lines of moonlight on the floor from the window. I rose into a sitting position, my eyes turning toward the glass. I climbed onto my knees, my fingers touching the cold bars.
Outside it was dark, the courtyard covered in snow beneath the moon. My eyes scanned the ground, moving toward the trees.
He was out there. Somewhere that strange man was there.
I jumped, my heart leaping into my throat as he appeared.
He stood in the now shirtless, his long blonde hair tied in a pony tail at his neck. His red eyes glared up at me as he smiled darkly.
I jumped backward, my back pressing into the wall as I closed my eyes. This had to be nightmare, it just had to be.
"Mary". His voice called to me as I squeezed my hands over my ears. "Mary". He sang again as I whimpered.
"Go away"! I screamed to the dark.
"I can save you Mary.. You don't have to stay there. Leave your room.. Come to me. You'll be free".
"No! No I won't"! I screamed curling into a ball on the mattress.
"Come on Mary. You want to be free don't you"?
"No! Go away!" I said shaking my head as the door flung open. "No"! I yelled, kicking and screaming as they restrained me to the bed. "He's out there! I saw him! He's going to kill me!"
"Sssh. sssh." John said leaning over me. "It's alright. No one will hurt you".
"He will. Out there go look"! I yelled as he shook his head.
"Rest Mary". He muttered, his hand pressing into my forehead.
"John please"! I whispered as the medicine of the needle erupted through my veins. "Pleeaase". I muttered, my head rolling into the pillow as I fell asleep.
"Mary". Another man's voice said in my ear.
I cringed, a cold hand pressing against my forehead.
My eyes shot open turning toward a pale man with long dark hair leaning over me.
"Mary". He sang, his red eyes flashing over my face.
My heart thudded in my chest, my lips quivering as I shook my head. "Don't kill me".
He smiled warmly as he knelt beside the bed, his fingers touching against my cheek.
Ice. Cold and dead. His fingers froze my skin. I stared up at him fearfully as he leaned forward.
"I will not kill you. But he will". He muttered nodding to the window. "Do you want to be free"? He whispered as I nodded quickly.
He smiled again as his hands flew across the restaints, freeing me instantly. He placed a hand on my back, lifting me into a sitting position as I stared down at the scars on my wrists. "Come Mary. It will all be over soon". He whispered taking my hand.
His movements were swift, seeming as if he were never kneeling in the first place as he was already at the window. I clung to his side as he clenched the bars, his hands snapping the metal fluidly. His arm tightened around my waist, pulling me into his side as he broke the glass. We flew through the air, landing in the snow. It was cold beneath my bare feet, yet nothing compared to his skin.
He swept me into his arms, sprinting toward the trees. Finally he stopped, my stomach doing back flips as he placed me on my feet.
His hand brushed across my chest, his eyes glimmering darkly. Meeting my gaze, he smiled. "I won't let him kill you". He muttered wrapping his arms around my shoulders. "I promise." He whispered pulling me against his rock hard chest.
I closed my eyes as his lips brushed against my skin. I gasped as something sharp pierced into my skin, fire shooting through my nerves.
"No!" Came a man's voice as the blond haired boy sprinted from the forest.
His hand closed around the dark haired man's neck, throwing him backward swiftly.
My hands clawed at the wound on my chest, my knees buckling beneath me.
His eyes flashed down at me angrily as he chased after the dark haired man.
Collapsing into the snow, my eyes flickered open and closed.
Fire. Everything was on fire. Screams echoed around me as the blond haired man stood a few feet from the asylum. Fire licked at the brick walls as people continued to scream. He smiled maliciously, his hand clenched tightly around a screaming woman's hair. Red hair. Red like fire. Victoria! She screamed and thrashed in his hand, tears pouring from her dark eyes as she pleaded with him.
The blond boy smiled darkly as the fire continued to burn everything it touched. Kneeling beside her, his hand wound tighter in her long hair. "You want me to save you?" He snickered as she trembled.
"Y-ye-yes". She stammered staring fearfully into his red eyes. "S-spare m-me".
The blond boy smiled, pulling Victoria tightly into his chest.
My eyes opened, the fire finally dying in my veins. I gasped, my chest heaving up and down as I looked around. Rolling onto my side, I coughed as my face got covered in snow. The forest around me was empty, no sounds but my ragged breaths.
I closed my eyes, a dream consuming me quickly.
"Alice." Jasper said looking at me softly.
"Jasper''. I said collapsing into his chest as a group of strange people watched us. A blond man, a brown haired woman, a dark haired boy, a blond girl.. These people were strange. Except one.
The boy I seen many times in my dreams. The boy who's arms I lay in now. Jasper..
The dream faded, the forest reappering. Climbing shakily to my feet, I turned and ran into the trees. The snow was no longer cold beneath my feet as I ran. I had no sense of direction, no course in which to travel. All I had was a face. His face. A name.. His name. Jasper.
Jasper stood silently in the doorway of the house, Tanya ruffling his hair from behind.
"You would think you'd comb your hair at least once a week". She said bitterly running the comb through his messy blond hair.
"Stop it Tanya". He said irritably swatting her hand away.
"Today is important, you have to look presentable." She placed her hands on her hips. "I know Alice likes a fixer upper but really".
Jasper's eyes narrowed as he shook his head. "You act as if you're the one getting married". He laughed, trying to suppress the butterflies ravaging his stomach.
"Jasper.. Seriously". She scolded, tossing the comb between her hands. Her eye brows rose as she watched him start to fidget with his suit. "Jaz.. You of all people aren't nervous are you?" She teased as he rolled his eyes.
"Of course I am. It's Alice". He barked with a frown. She was just as bothersome as Emmett.
"True. I always noticed how you act when it comes to her." She noted quietly as he ran his fingers through his hair.
"I just want things to go right for once." He mumbled staring out the door. "Nothing else has gone right in my life before her, I really don't want to mess this up".
"Oh enough Jasper really. Alice is here now what does the past matter anyway"? She said floating in front of him. Tracing her fingers along his jaw, she smoothed the tiny hairs of his side burns. Looking into her eyes, her mood turned stern. "You cannot simply dwell in the past. You and Alice are going to have a wonderful future focus on that."
He nodded slowly, his smile still hesitant. "Thank you Tanya".
She glanced over his shoulder silently as Edward walked toward them. Emmett shuffled a few feet away, his grin playful. "Finally tying the knot eh"? He muttered punching Jasper's shoulder.
"Esme said Alice is almost ready". Edward said standing beside Tanya. He smirked as Jasper nodded swiftly. "Alice is excited. She wanted to run down here herself but Esme and Irina and Rosalie had to pretty much barricade her in the room."
Jasper smiled casually, his hands sliding into his pockets. "That's Alice".
"Well let's get going. Carlisle's waiting in the gazebo."
The four walked out onto the snow covered lawn, passing the white tent covered with pink flowers. Emmett stuck out his tongue.
"Gueez. I hate weddings. All this girlie stuff.. I hope this is our last one". He shifted his suit jacket as Carlisle walked toward them. "I hate these monkey suits."
Carlisle laughed lightly, his hand touching against Jasper's shoulder. "Well don't count anything out Emmett". He said flashing a grin at Edward as he shrugged. Looking up at Jasper, he walked toward the gazebo. "Come on then. The girls are on their way out".
Jasper nodded swiftly falling into step with Carlisle as Edward, Emmett and Tanya lagged behind.
He stood beneath the flower covered gazebo, looking quite uncomfortable to anyone who didn't know him. Yet everyone knew this is what he wanted the most. He talked for seven years about marrying Alice, finally working up the courage to ask her last month. It was just what any Southern gentleman could have asked for. A perfect woman like Alice agreeing to marry him. He stiffened as he looked past Edward and Emmett's heads, Rosalie, Esme and Irina walking slowly toward them. He peeked over their heads to the tiny pixie hiding behind a lace veil. His dead heart jumped at the sight of her.
The three women parted as they arrived at the gazebo, Alice fluttering to Jasper's side with a wide grin.
He traced his fingers along her cheek, smiling brightly as she beamed up at him. Her short dress brushed against her knees as she bounced up and down excitedly.
Carlisle did a quick ceremony, not being a real priest of course. When the last words were finally spoken, Jasper scooped Alice's small body into his arms crushing his lips against hers.
Night fell as the small wedding party danced inside the tent. Jasper and Alice had their first dance, Jasper refusing to let her feet touch the ground as he held her against his chest. Alice leaned into him, her tiny feet dangling over the wood as she smiled widely. Carlisle took a dance with Alice and then Edward, and finally Emmett.
If the height difference between her and Jasper was shocking, the one between her and Emmett was staggering. He held her a good two feet off the ground, complaining it was annoying to lean so far down to dance with her. Alice giggled lightly, her tiny hands resting on his large shoulders as he threw out his famous inappropriate wedding jokes. The night passed slowly as everyone enjoyed a rare moment of peace.
With a wedding party full of vampires they felt totally at ease. And having no guests, they could all be themselves.
Emmett insisted that Jasper take off Alice's garter, which he did. Happily taking the tiny strip of lace in between his teeth and grazing his lips down her thigh. Edward gagged from Esme's side, his hands closed tightly over his ears. He mumbled curses about innappropriate thoughts as everyone laughed.
It started to snow as the moon passed across the night sky. Finally they ran out of things to do and everyone retired to the main house.
Jasper and Alice disappeared upstairs, slamming the door shut as Emmett hooted and whistled.
Sitting on the bed, Alice clenched Jasper's hands tightly as she grinned.
"There is something else." Jasper whispered as her eyebrows raised.
She watched him lean across the bed, his shoulder muscles flexing beneath his thin white shirt. He smirked as he looked back at Alice. "Easy love. There will be plenty of time for that in a moment". He sat up, a wooden guitar hanging in his hand.
Alice grinned, seeing what this was going to lead to.
"I know I've said a lot in our time together. How much you mean to me is beyond anything the mind of a Southern boy can come up with."
Alice giggled, her hand brushing against his thigh. "I don't mind."
Jasper smilled, his fingers positioning himself on the neck of the guitar. "I tried to not think too much about this lest you know what I was planning. So if it isn't very good please understand, it came together just a few moments before I got ready."
Alice beamed, her eyes glimmering brightly. "I'm sure I'll love it".
Jasper nodded as he looked down at his hands, his voice pouring out of his lips steadily and quietly at first.
"There's nothing I could say to you,
Nothing I could ever do to make you see,
What you mean to me.."
He looked up at Alice the corners of her eyes pulled up as she grinned.
He shifted closer to her, his fingers flying across the cords. Her head bowed down, resting on his shoulder as his voice rose, filling their small bedroom.
"All the pain, the tears I cried,
Still you never said goodbye and now I know..
How far you'd go.
I know I let you down,
But it's not like that now,
This time I'll never let you go"
Footsteps echoed up the stairs as the others leaned against the door.
Jasper laughed, his concentration breaking as he heard the others outside of the room.
"Keep going". Alice whispered touching her hand against his knee.
He nodded looking up at her smoothly as he began singing again.
"I will be, all that you want.
And get myself together,
Cause you keep me from falling apart.
All my life, I'll be with you forever.
To get you through the day,
And make everything okay."
His voice dropped slightly as his eyes shut tightly. Alice wrapped her arm around his waist, her fingers sinking beneath the top of his pants.
Jasper looked back at her, his expression solem for a moment before flashing back to cheerful.
"I thought that I had everything
I didn't know what life could bring
But now I see, honestly.
You're the one thing I got right
The only one I let inside
Now I can breathe, cause you're here with me.."
He breathed slowly, Alice's hand weaving over the top button of his shirt.
His voice turned husky as her fingers brushed across his chest. He smiled as her nails traced small circles across his skin. He laughed as Edward groaned, his feet echoing across the wood as he hurried down stairs. The others followed soon after, disappearing from the house.
"And if I let you down,
I'll turn it all around.
Cause I would never let you go. I will be, all that you want.
And get myself together,
Cause you keep me from falling apart".
"All my life, I'll be with you forever,
To get you through the day.
And make everything okay.
Cause without you I can’t sleep,
I'm not going ever, ever let you leave.
You're all I've got, you're all I want.
Yeah. And without you I don't know what I'd do.
I can never, ever live a day without you.
Here with me, do you see?You're all I need".
Alice's hand moved further down his chest, gliding over his abs as his breathing became labored. Her eyes locked with his as she smiled warmly.
Jasper closed his eyes, his hand closing on her wrist, swiftly yanking it into the air. "Sorry love but that is a bit distracting." He laughed heartedly as she shrugged. "There will be plenty of time for that in a moment." He winked as the air in the house was as quite as a morge. "I drove them out with my thoughts of you".
Alice bit her bottom lip, her eyes shutting smoothly. "Well continue then. It's getting harder to control myself".
"Yes. Mrs. Witlock". He smirked as she beamed, taking a breath he continued.
"And I will be, all that you want,
And get myself together. Cause you keep me from falling apart. All my life, I'll be with you forever.
To get you through the day.
And make everything okay."
Alice bounced up and down, her moods washing over Jasper completely. He smirked as she shifted toward his front, her hands gliding down his stomach. She pushed forward, pushing him backward onto the mattress as he balanced the guitar on his chest.
"I will be , all that you want,
And get myself together.
Cause you keep me from falling apart..And all my life, you know I'll be with you forever
To get you through the day.
And make everything okay".
He clamped his mouth shut as Alice wrapped her fingers around the neck of the guitar, lowering it carefully over the side of the bed.
"Antsy aren't we"? he muttered sliding his hands up her sides as she perched on his lap.
Alice's smile grew as she shrugged. "I love when you sing. And besides, it is our wedding night".
Jasper nodded smoothly, his smile appearing. "Better not keep Mrs. Witlock waiting much longer eh"? He whispered, pressing her against him.
"No. No you should not". She teased, crushing her lips against his as they moaned in unison.
Emmett and Rosalie strode ahead of us, Emmett's booming voice echoing of the brick walls of the cafeteria building. Alice and Jasper walked behind him, their hands weaved together in a tight vice grip. Jasper's eyes flashed anxiously at the humans sitting on the grass. Alice squeezed his hand, her smile reassuring. Their thoughts were a mixture or lusty fantasies, memories, and sweet nothings for one another. It's one thing to have to listen to these things once, but to hear it a million times a day was nauseating.
I glared at my feet, wanting nothing more than to go home. School was a constant bore and add to that my siblings incessant flirting, it was almost too much for my sanity to take. Emmett pryed back the glass door, the eyes of the cafeteria turning to him immediately.
'Those strange Cullens again'. One girl's mind said.
'That Rosalie is so pretty, that ain't right'. Another girl thought as she glared at the table.
'Edward..' Several girls thought as they gazed up at me.
I sent them a charming smirk, listening to their heart quicken.
Jasper spun Alice under his arms, jealous thoughts from girls as well as boys filled my head.
'He's so creepy. He shouldn't be with her'. A senior boy thought from across the room.
'She's so lucky'. this girl named Anna thought as she leaned around her friend to gaze longingly at Jasper.
I picked through the different scents and thoughts of the people around as we moved toward our usual table. Suddenly, a completely different scent washed up my nose. My eyes flickered instantly to the source.
A strange new girl was sitting with Jessica Stanley and Angela.. Angela. Angela- what's her face.
She was watching me hesitantly, her heart thuddering in her chest. I smiled down at her, feeling her pulse quicken as I did.
What day is it? And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive.
I can't keep up and I can't back down.
I've been losing so much time.
I turned toward the table, still feeling her eyes on my back. Jessica muttered something about not even bothering, and 'Apparantly no one in this school is good enough for him'. I smirked sliding into the chair with my hands on the table.
Jessica's thoughts were that of a typical girl's. Boy, boys, boys and shockingly boys.. I listened to Angela's thoughts which were a mixture of curiosity and lust for Jasper.
I tapped Jasper's hand, nodding toward her as he shook his head.
My mind focused on the new girl. Nothing came. I tried harder, my brows pulling together tightly as I focused. Still nothing.
"What's wrong Edward"? Alice said glancing across the room to where I was now glaring.
Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do.
Nothing to lose.
And it's you and me and all of the people.
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you.
Nothing. Not a single thought. She might as well be brain dead. But that wasn't possible. Her expression flickered back and forth, her eyelids quivering, her tongue gliding on the inside of her cheek, her brows furrowing. She had to thinking about something, but why couldn't I hear it.
Rosalie glanced at me, and I felt her eyes burning holes in my face.
"That's Isabella Swan. Chief Swan's daughter". Alice said looking up at Jasper lovingly. "She's pretty."
Rosalie scoffed, her body pressing into Emmett's wide shoulder.
Charlie Swan's daughter, I had heard rumors about her. News traveled fast in Forks, and nothing was a secret to me.
I looked back at Alice, knowing my face was a mixture of anger and frustration. Jasper sensed my uneasiness as soon as I looked toward them. "I can't hear anything she's thinking". I muttered faster and softer than any human could have heard.
"Probably because you're hungry". Emmett whispered, sliding our prop tray of food toward me. He chuckled as I rolled my eyes.
"That has never affected me before." I shook my head, my eyes flashing to her one more time.
She was still staring at me, trying to hide it by turning her head.
"I'm gonna go". I muttered jumping to my feet, everyone's eyes darting up at me.
Alice frowned, her finger's brushing across the top of Jasper's knuckles. She often did that unconsciously when she was concerned.
I flashed her a comforting smile as I stepped away. "I'll meet you in the parking lot." I glanced back at the Swan girl for a moment before hurrying out of the double doors.
All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right.
I'm tripping on words,
You've got my head spinning.
I don't know where to go from here.
I sped toward my next class, ignoring the confused looks and thoughts of the people I passed. Gliding through the door, I settled into my chair just before the bell rang.
I took a long breath, the smells of the room flowing up my nostrils. Closing my eyes, I tried to focus on why I couldn't hear her thoughts. Clearly she was not a vampire so that was not the reason. I tried to think of other reasons I could hear her. Nothing came to me. It couldn't be interference. I could be in a crowd of a hundred and still be able to hear anyone's thoughts as if they were my own. And it wasn't my hunger. That was never an issue for me.
I looked up as the scents of the other students filled the room. My muscles tightened as her scent reached me. I glared down at the table. Should I run? I was getting more tense as the seconds ticked by. Her scent was so enthralling. It was like sending a recently sober alcoholic into a room full of wine and tequila and asking him to not touch anything. It made me want to rip her throat out the moment she came near me.
As if my worse fears were heard, the teacher directed her toward the seat next to me.
Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do.
Nothing to prove.
And it's you and me and all of the people.
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you.
I sucked my breath into my lungs, holding my nose tightly closed as she floated toward the stool. She glanced at me for a moment, her face pulled into a confused expression.
Still nothing. Just dead silence in her mind. Not a single thought. This was becoming infuriating.
I pulled away from her as she sat beside me, her scent enveloping me completely. Squeezing my fists tightly, I tried to focus on anything to keep me from killing her. I repeated Carlisle's words in my head. The words he said to me when I first became a vampire. 'Try to humanize them. Don't look at them simply as sustinance. See them as a person. Focus on thier humanity rather than their blood.'
So I tried, my eyes dancing toward her cautiously.
Long wavy dark hair, the strands curling lightly at the bottom. A smooth, very sickly pale complexion. Deep brown eyes, a unique soul looming beneath them. This girl was definitely perceptive. It was starting to work until I breathed again.
There's something about you now.
I can't quite figure out..
Everything she does is beautiful.
Everything she does is right.
I scooted even farther from her, watching her face twist with confusion and hurt.
Sliding the glass toward her, I watched her sniff her hair. How comical. Like I'd care if she sweat or not. It was her blood that was keeping me from her.
Class was agonizingly long today. Nothing I told my mind was working to keep me from thinking about her blood. It was usually easier with their thoughts consuming my brain, but with her there was nothing. All I could think about was killing her.
Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do.
Nothing to lose.
And it's you and me and all of the people.
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you,
and me and all of the people with nothing to do.
Nothing to prove.
And it's you and me and all of the people.
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you,
I could sense the bell was going to ring, and wasted no time. Leaping from my seat, I darted for the door as her eyes turned to me quickly.
I sped down the halls, quickly decending the stairs to the parking lot. Jasper and Alice looked at me as I arrived at the car.
"What's with you"? Jasper whispered most likely feeling my panic and distress.
"Nothing". I hissed as I watched Isabella Swan walk toward her truck.
What day is it?
And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive..
"Let's go". I muttered as they nodded moving fluidly into the car.
I watched her send a fleeting look at me before I threw myself into the driver's seat, immursing myself in my sibling's scents. Breathing a slow sigh of relief, I started the car and sped away from the parking lot and that strange girl.
He stood in front of the burning pyre, now a tower six feet into the air. He clenched and unclenched his fists, the fresh scars forming on his pale skin. She glided behind his back, her long nails tracing between his shoulder blades.
Her movements were swift and catlike as she floated around, her red eyes flashing toward his blank face. She lifted her hands, placing them on his stone chest as he tensed.
“Why do you torture yourself my love”? She whispered, her lips pursed as she watched him close his eyes. “They are nothing. Merely beasts who have outlived their usefulness.” She leaned toward his lips, her long hair brushing over his skin. She wrapped her fingers around the back of his neck, her lips touching lightly against his.
“Your love is a lie!” He snapped, his eyes flashing open angrily as he pushed her backward. “You are the embodiment of all lies”.
She hissed at him, her dark eyes flashing viciously.
“Fine, pity the dead, wallow in despair. It matters not to me.” She stalked past him, her eyes turning sharply over her shoulder. “If you pity these creatures you are far more stupid than I thought”.
He turned away, disappearing into the dark trees. The moon hung high above him, mocking him in its perfection. He slowed to a stop, now several miles from the plantation house he shared with her.
That witch Maria, the woman whom gave him the dark gift and this life of bloodshed. How he hated her, yet how he was attached to her.
He crouched down on the grass, perfectly balanced on the balls of his feet. He ran his fingers up the length of his arms. The scars of his slain victims, a constant reminder or the things he had done.
He pressed his claw into his skin, digging a small hole in his flesh. Vampire skin; impenetrable to all matter except the claws of their kind, a fatal flaw to his victims. How easy it was for him to tear them to shreds as he had done this night.
I hurt myself today.
To see if I still feel,
I focus on the pain.
The only thing that's real.
The needle tears a hole,
The old familiar sting.
Try to kill it all away,
But I remember everything.
Would his eternal life always be this way? Would he have to suffer through the emotions of his dying victims forever? Most likely. As long as he traveled with Maria it would be. Unless there came a time when she no longer found him useful and disposed of him as she did the others.
He wondered what Peter had found. The one newborn he had let escape. Had he found salvation? Was he slaughtered? There was no way of knowing. He had not seen the boy in months.
He stared through the dark trees, his eyes focusing on nothing in particular.
Everything was quiet, the sound of distant footsteps echoing miles away, light and quick, probably deer.
He sighed as he stared down at the wound he had made, it was already healing itself.
He tensed as swift footsteps flew across the grass, within fifteen feet of him. He leaped to his feet, his eyes scanning the trees. His eyes widened as a flash of dark hair passed. The figure matched his height, as well as his structure. Thin, and toned. A woman ran next to him, her brown hair fluttering behind her.
He watched them from the darkness, the dark haired figure turning in his direction.
“Jasper”!? Came Peter’s voice as he stopped. He approached Jasper slowly, the woman clinging to his side.
Jasper relaxed slightly, his smile polite. “Peter”.
Peter’s eyes flashed up and down Jasper’s slim frame. “It has been a while friend.”
What have I become?
My sweetest friend.
Everyone I know,
goes away .
In the end.
“That it has comrade”. Jasper said quietly as Peter walked toward him, his hand touching his shoulder.
Jasper looked toward the woman beside Peter, one of the newborns named Charlotte.
Peter glanced back at her, his hand wrapping tightly around her waist. “This is Jasper he-“
“I know who he is.” Charlotte choked, her eyes flashing fearfully up at Peter. “He is the one whom slain the others. He kills under Maria’s command”. She clenched his hand tightly. “We must go”.
Jasper fell silent as Peter sent him an apologetic look. Raising his hand, Peter tapped her arm. “No love, he spared me. He let me go, he is not like her”.
Charlotte glanced timidly at Jasper.
“Come with us”. Peter said, his eyes flashing brightly. Charlotte’s eyes widened. “This life is not for you. You wouldn’t have allowed me to live if you were like her. You can leave this place, there are so much better things out there.”
And you could have it all.
My empire of dirt,
I will let you down.
I will make you hurt.
Jasper shook his head. “Maria will not simply let me leave. She will come for me and kill me and any whom I am with”.
Peter pressed on. “But Jasper she cannot find you. You can hide in the other territories. Or on the other side of the world if you prefer. Maria would not dare venture so far from home”.
Charlotte took in Jasper’s sullen expression. “Peter has spoke of life elsewhere. He says it is so much different from here. You don’t need to suffer.”
Jasper sighed, his eyes turning back to the path. To the path that would take him into Maria’s clutches once more. Breathing softly, he looked up at Peter. “We must go now then. Leave many miles behind us, mix our scents”.
I wear this crown of thorns.
Upon my liar's chair.
Full of broken thoughts,
I cannot repair.
Peter smiled, his eyes flickering to Charlotte. “We will all have a new life. A great one, away from the witch.”
Charlotte nodded enthusiastically as she looked at Jasper.
“Come on”. He muttered quickly breaking into a sprint as the other two followed.
The first years with Peter and Charlotte were some of the best in his existence. He lived each day with a sliver of hope he had not had in decades. Yet he did not feel complete.
He still felt the emotions of his victims each time he killed. His heart may have been bandaged, yet it was still broken, missing essential pieces. After many more months, he finally came to a decision.
Beneath the stains of time.
The feelings disappear.
You are someone else,
I am still right here .
He approached Peter after they killed several men on the outskirts of town. Walking beside the only friend he had ever known, the two exchanged a glance.
“You are not happy are you”? Peter said as he folded his hands behind his back.
“No. I still feel distraught after each kill. I think for now I must be alone.”
Peter fell silent, his eyes dancing up the cobblestone streets. Turning to Jasper, he smiled. “I hope you find what it is you seek.” Peter extended his hand, Jasper taking it firmly as they met each other’s eyes.
“I hope so too my friend.” Jasper whispered as Peter released his hand.
“I do wish our paths will cross again in the future.” He said as Jasper nodded.
“I am sure it will”. He said politely as he turned away. “Good luck.” He muttered sprinting into the alley.
Peter stared after him, Charlotte gliding from the shadows of the alley behind him. “Good luck friend.”
What have I become?
My sweetest friend.
Everyone I know goes away,
In the end.
And you could have it all,
My empire of dirt.
I will let you down.
I will make you hurt.
He traveled an entire decade alone, never quite finding what he sought. Though he despised it, he resorted to killing animals to be free of his grief. Yet it didn’t last long. He killed less and less often as to keep the pain from returning.
He wandered into Pennsylvania, heading in no particular direction. He had no concept of time; months, years, decades.. Time meant nothing to him.
Though he did notice the steady progression of technology; strange metal ‘automobiles’ replacing the horse drawn carriages on the roads, light bulbs replacing oil lamps. Things were becoming stranger and stranger.
If I could start again,
A million miles away.
Floating silently through the streets, he hid his red eyes with his hair. It began to rain lightly, the drops of water landing on his shoulders. By the look of the weather, he assumed it was getting closer to spring.
He eluded suspicion by acting as the humans around him did. Finding shelter under the tin roof of a diner, he watched the people disappear from the streets. Turning toward the diner, he stared through the rain streaked glass.
He placed his hand on the door knob, pulling the door back with a fluid motion.
Settling in a booth on the far side of the diner, he tried to quell the raging fire in his throat. He tensed as a young girl approached, her movements to swift and graceful to be human. He watched her dance toward him, stopping beside the table.
“You’ve kept me waiting a long time.” She sang in a voice that made him forget all about his thirst.
I would keep myself.
He looked up into her amber eyes, feeling something forming inside of his chest. Something glimmered in his soul awakening a long forgotten feeling. Hope.
He smiled politely. “Sorry Ma’am”.
He watched her extend her hand toward him smiling brightly. Taking her tiny hand in his own, he turned toward the door.
I would find a way.
Chapter 1: Chapter 1
I found myself running, my mind blank, my face cold as the air whipped over it. My hands were thrown out behind me as my feet thudded soundlessly on the grass. I stared ahead of me, my eyes not finding anything in particular in the blur of the forest. I leaped over a boulder, my knees buckling slightly as I landed, breaking into a sprint.
After a few hours of running, I realized the similarities in the trees, the moss, everything. I froze in my spot, a cold sweat trickling down my neck.
My eyes snapped in all directions, mentally noting a familiar rock, or upturned tree. If I had a heart, it would have plunged into my gut.
This forest was one I traveled many times in the past year, the trail like an extension of my body. Long, winding, non threatening. I sucked in a deep breath, the forest air sticking to my tongue. It was so fresh here, in my special meadow.
I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to push away the memories that flashed in my mind. They moved a thousand miles a minute. A pale face, wide questioning brown eyes set on perfect high cheek bones. Long brown hair hung down her shoulders, a slight wave to it as it reached the tips. A soft smile played on her thin pink lips, as a beautiful red blush painted her cheeks. Her hand reached out toward me, her fingers brushing hesitantly across my cheek. I shuttered as I was thrust from the memory, plunged into a deeper, darker one.
Blackness swirled around me, breaking away piece by piece to reveal the white room.
The faces of my family members twisted in horror and lust as they stared at the bleeding cut on her finger. I watched myself collide with my brother Jasper, our strengths matched as he trashed at Bella. His claws extended as his eyes flashed wildly at the petrified girl.
Again I was thrown back, this time into consciousness.
I gasped as I realized just how dangerous this place was. Or rather the situation. Here I was, standing in my meadow in the town of Forks, no more than a few miles from Bella's home. Within a few short bounds of my true love, my soul mate.
I clenched my fists tightly my feet taking root in the ground as I shut my eyes. I needed to run, disappear back into the mountains before she realized I was here. I needed to disappear, to leave her life forever, as I had originally intended. I needed to save her, if only from myself.
Yet my feet would not move. Not in the direction I wanted them to. I found myself sprinting up the hillside, my hands still clenched together. The road was on the opposite side of the trees, I could feel her now. I could taste her blood in my mouth, feel the beating of her heart, the smell of her hair. I heard her shallow breaths, sobs. I slowed yet didn't stop.
This was truly a mistake, what the hell is wrong with me? Was I so jealous I would tear apart her world just to be with her again? Though I was a monster doing something so selfish sickened me. She needed to be happy, she needed to live her life and forget about me. No matter how hard it was for me to think about, she needed to feel as if I never existed. I looked up at the high windows of her bedroom looming no more than ten feet from where I stood.
I crept quietly into the yard, my mind all to aware of Charlie. I knew if he saw me, after all the pain I caused his daughter, he wouldn't hesitate to shoot me. Yet I didn't care, I would have welcomed the bullets with a smile. At least if he blasted every part of me away I would still have her face in my mind. My hands found their place in the wood as I crept up the wall. It came effortlessly to me, and I arrived at her window within a minute. I paused, my hands clenched on the windowsill as I took a calming breath. She seemed to be asleep, yet not throughly. I needed to be extremely quiet.
I pulled myself onto the windowsill, my hand pressing against the glass as I pushed it open. All at once her amazing scent washed over me, I nearly fell backward. It was still as enticing as the first time I saw her, still drew me toward her. I turned to the bed, my eyes falling on her sleeping form beneath the comforter.
I slid into the room, my movements even more calculated as I edged against the wall.
All of my body felt as if it were being pulled toward her. My chest ached longingly, my hands reached out, my lips even shifted in her direction. I snapped myself back against the wall, my claws digging into the drywall.
I blinked as I watched her chest rise and fall.
She looked so peaceful, just as I remembered. My memories of her asleep were clear as day, they were my second favorite ones. It is because she was at her most vunerable, all her defenses lowered. Her mind was finally opened to me as she whispered my name in her dreams.
I jumped as her voice pulled me back to my current reality. For an instant I thought she saw me and I was tempted the throw myself out the window.
"Edward". She whispered again as she turned over.
Now I began to see her face, my body froze as if I were in the deepest part of the ocean.
Tears left trails down her pale cheeks, a sure sign that the sobbing I heard earlier had occured. She'd cried, just as I feared. Was I to blame? I watched her twitch, her eyebrows furrowing as she cried louder. "Edward! Don't leave please"! She cried to the dark.
I felt myself slinking back toward the window, though my body screamed in protest. Shaking my head, I squeezed my eyes shut, throwing myself through the small space in the window into the dark trees.
Chapter 2: Chapter 2
I sat in the small rusted cab, the wheels shaking the seat beneath me as it thudded over rocks and potholes in the dirt road. My eyes were on the sky above, the black blanket bearing down on the tiny forest village around us. The deep rumbling of the engine filled the air around me, yet I only heard one thing. Her voice.
Like a pure bell ringing in my ears, she spoke. "Edward", She whispered to me. I clenched the arm rest tightly, my eyes squeezing shut.
This was truly torture, yet it had to be done. She had to forget about the monster whom she loved. She had to live.
I opened my eyes slowly as I let out a sigh. It had been four months since my return to Forks, yet the hurt did not fade. It still rang through me, only intensified by my own longing to be with her. I looked up as the Brazilian cab driver eyed me wearily.
Shoving my hand into my pocket, I thrust a collection of bills over the seat at him.
I glided out of the cab smoothly as the tires screeched away. Slowly I began walking down the dark path toward the trees, my throat itching for blood. I needed a distraction, anything. I disappeared into the trees, quenching my thirst quickly.
Yet another thirst remained, yet this one was not quenchable.
I hurried to the harbor, my hands sifting through my pocket quickly. Running to the edge of the pier, I leapt into the boat, plunging the keys into the ignition silently. The engine roared to life and I thudded down on the pedal. The black ocean passed by me in a blur, sea and sky mixing together as I fell back into my memories. As I neared the isle of Esme, I slowed.
I hurried onto the pier, my eyes not even trailing to the tropical scenery. I sped into the house, not bothing to turn on any of the lights as I moved to the living room. Sliding into the couch I buried my head in my hands losing myself completely in my memories.
You left me hanging from a thread we once swung from together,
I've licked my wounds but I can't ever see them getting better.
Something's gotta change,
Things cannot stay the same.
I don't know how long I remained in that lifeless position. Weeks? Months? It was difficult to say. Though I did notice I was becoming quite the hot topic amongst the house keepers. As they whispered about the strange way I was behaving. I almost laughed. The only thing that shook me from my trance was the shrill ring of my cell phone in the bed room. I glided to a standing position, floating silently into the bedroom.
My hand closed around the phone, my eyes flashing down at the caller ID. Rosalie..
It was strange that she would be calling me. After all she was thoroughly fed up with my attitude after leaving Forks and my insistent plea to be alone in Esme's home. I flipped the reciever open, my hand bringing the phone weakly to my ear.
"Rose"? I said questioningly as the other side of the phone remained muted.
After two minutes of silence, I heard her voice. It was soft, unsure, something that I rarely heard. "Edward." She began softly, her tone hesitant.
I frowned as I glared down at the nightstand. Why would Rosalie seem so unsure? What was bothering her in such a way it caused her to call me out of the blue?
"Edward". She whispered again, as I nodded.
"Yes Rose"?
"Please-" She cut off, I heard a whimper before she returned to the phone. "Please don't be angry".
"What is it Rosalie"? I said, even I heard the irritation in my voice. If she was playing a game I was completely not in the mood.
She paused, a lengthly silence drawing out before she spoke again. "Alice had a vision". She said grimly as my hand trembled. "She's gone to Forks".
My body began to quiver all over as I pressed the phone tightly to my ear. "Rosalie"? I hissed, no longer trying to hide my frustration or my growing fear. "What is it?! What did she see"?!
"She-" Rosalie took a deep breath. "She saw Bella-"
My jaw dropped open as my mind swirled with blackness. I leaned against the bed frame, my knees suddenly feeling extremely weak.
"Edward"? She said frantically as I shook my head.
"I'm still here". I whispered, my eyes turning to the ground.
"She.. She saw Bella throw herself off a cliff." She said shakily.
The phone dropped from my hand, landing on the floor with a deafening crack. My entire body began shaking uncontrollably as I rose to my feet. My mind blacked out completely, as I started screaming and ripping pieces of the bed apart and throwing them against the wall.
Rosalie screamed in the phone, her voice in total panic as I assumed her heard the growls and crashes.
I ignored it, falling deeply into my own rage. I was truly becoming the monster I was meant to be.
I snapped away the thick wood of the head board, crushing it into dust in my hands as I growled. My body folded over in half as my claws began ripping at the floor boards. I kicked my foot back roughly, snapping the doors of the nightstand in half. Another scream clawed up my throat shaking the room violently as I ripped apart the bed.
Bella's face filled my mind as I continued my destruction. Every emotion leaked out of my pores until I felt nothing, collapsing numbly on the floor.
Staring at the phone that lay silent, I reached out to it. Rosalie must have long ago hung up to tell the others of my outburst. As I clenched the tiny device in my hand, I was careful not to turn it to dust as well.
Her hair was pressed against her face, her eyes were red with anger.
Enraged by things unsaid and empty beds and bad behavior.
Something's gotta change,
It must be rearranged..
I stared at the grains in the wood, knowing instantly what I was going to do.
I swore if she had died I would not live on. I would honor that promise. At least one promised honored would count for something. I pulled myself heavily to my feet, my finger on the power button of the phone. Shuffling toward the door, I broke into a frenzied sprint out the double doors onto the sand.
Chapter 3: Chapter 3
I sat stoically in my seat on the plane, my fists clenched firmly on the metal arm rests. I ignored the nervous glances of the stewartess' and passengers around me. I stared blankly ahead, my thoughts spinning around my head wildly. Each time I came near a rational answer to this crisis, her face flashed.
"Edward, you're not a monster". She whispered as she touched my cheek.
But she was wrong, if Esme's bedroom was any indication. I was a monster. I took the heart of the girl whom was my world and crushed it. I drove her into's death's arms and cost her a place in heaven. Surely no matter how pure she was, killing herself would not be overlooked. It was all my fault.
I wanted so badly to be human at the moment. I cry, to bleed, to be vunerable. I wanted to walk up to the security guards in the terminal, place the barrel of their gun to my chest and let them shoot me dead. Yet that was not my destiny. I lived as a monster and as such I had to die a monster. I could not long for a humanity that had long since died.
My only option was to go to Italy, become such a nuscience that they would have to kill me. And then my suffering would end and I would be reunited with my Bella.
I'm sorry, I did not mean to hurt my little girl.
It's beyond me, I cannot carry the weight of the heavy world.
So goodnight, goodnight, goodnight, goodnight..
Goodnight, goodnight, goodnight, goodnight..
Goodnight, hope that things work out all right.
I wanted to hold her in my arms, crush her to me in death so I didn't have to fear breaking her. Weep into her soft hair and wait for eternity to pass.
But that was not going to happen. At the moment I had to focus on my death that I would cause. I looked out the window as the Italian airport drew nearer. Turning back toward the seat in front of me, my mind flashed over the faces of my family members.
Alice, the wonderfully annoying little pixie whom I loved as a little sister. Jasper, her silent, overly cautious mate and my comrade in both times of war and times of leisure. Emmett, my thick headed compainion whom was always in competition mode. I would surely miss his jokes. Rosalie, the vain yet protective sister whom occasionally got under my skin but was a friend at the same time. Calisile, my father for many centuries. Wise, kind, the martyr of our coven. I knew he would not be happy with my decision to kill myself, but he would understand. And Esme, my kind, loving adoptive mother of sorts, I would miss her dimpled smiles.
Yet as much as I tried not to think about it, my mind always returned to the same image, the same face. Bella's.
The room was silent as we all tried so hard to remember.
The way it feels to be alive.
The day that he first met her.
Something's gotta change,
Things cannot stay the same.
Her face motivated my feet forward as I entered the Volturi territory. Her voice kept my resolve strong as I entered the covent's lair and faced their leader Aro. Yet with all this, it could not change the fact that this king of our kind would not slay me. Now I was left with nothing. My only hope was to expose our kind to humans. And I knew the perfect moment in which to do that.
I waited in the dark alley, my eyes on the sky above me. Outside I could hear the excited chatter of the towns people as they moved in the village square. My hands rested on the buttons of my shirts, drawing each of them away slowly.
Soon it would be time, soon I would die and be with her. I felt the fabric fall down my shoulders landing in a puddle at my feet. I looked down at my own skin as it glimmered lightly. The moment was drawing near, soon I would step into the sun like a gleaming diamond. The human's would shriek in surprise at the strange creature before them. The Volturi's men would come for me, and my suffering would end.
In these last moment's I let my mind dwell on Bella's face. I memorized each feature, hoping I could keep my memories in Hell. Her soft, perfect eyes. Her lips. Her ears. Her chin. The small crinkle that formed on her nose when she was angry. I smiled to myself.
An eternity of damnation would be worth it if I could keep her face in my mind.
You make me think of someone wonderful, but I can't place her,
I wake up every morning wishing one more time to face her.
Something's gotta change,
It must be rearranged.
"I'm sorry Bella. I will be with you soon.. I promise." I whispered to the dark as I shut my eyes.
For some reason death was comforting. With nothing to live for it was welcomed. I opened my eyes slowly, turning my gaze toward the sun.
I'm sorry, I did not mean to hurt my little girl.
I lingered in my thoughts for a few moments.
I imagined Bella laying in my arms, her head against my chest. Her hands wandered over my body as she smiled up at me shyly. Her hair brushed against my chin filling my nostrils with her sweet scent. I placed my hands on her shoulders, pushing her onto her back as I climbed on top of her. My weight rested on my arms as I lay in between her legs. Her hands traveled up my neck as she smiled at me seductively. My hand closed around her cheek, pulling her lips fiercely against my own. I bit hungrily down on her lips trying to relish every moment of our kiss.
Her hands found my belt loop as she tugged at it eagerly. I laughed against her neck, trailing kisses down to her collar bone and back to her lips. She laughed in my ear, her voice even more perfect and beautiful than I remembered. My hand pulled her lips back to mine, crushing my tongue into her mouth.
We laughed together as we parted, her eyes gleaming as she looked up at me. "I love you Edward." She whispered as her hair lay matted with sweat around her face.
I smiled down at her as I touched my lips to her forehead. "I love you more Bella".
So much to love,
So much to learn.
But I won't be there to teach you.
I know I can be close,
But I try my best to reach you.
I pulled myself from my memories taking a cautious step toward the light. Extending my arms, I closed my eyes, ready to welcome the sun. I slid my eyes closed as I took another step toward the square.
"Edward"! Bella's voice called in my ear.
"Don't worry. I'll be with you soon." I replied back to her in my mind.
"Edward"! She said again, her voice more frantic.
"Don't worry my love. I will never hurt you again I swear. I am doing this for you, for us".
"Edward look at me"! She screamed
"I am my love, your face has never left my mind, not even for a moment".
I'm so sorry, I did not mean to hurt my little girl..
It's beyond me, I cannot carry the weight of a heavy world..
I took another step toward the light, feeling the heat touch my skin. It made no difference, I was dead inside and out.
So goodnight,
I took another step .
goodnight,
And another.
goodnight, goodnight..
I stood at the mouth of the alley, my hands extended outward, my palms facing the sky. I imagined I would have looked like Jesus to those who didn't know better to know I was actually Satan.
Goodnight, goodnight, goodnight, goodnight..
"Edward! No"! Bella cried.
I smiled, my mind answering her cries. "Don't worry my love, I am here".
Goodnight, goodnight, goodnight, goodnight..
Chapter 4: Chapter 4
Something crashed into my chest then. Small, insignificant. My arms wrapped around it, praying it was the grim reaper to take me. Yet this was a strange reaper. My hands moved over the slim shoulders and small waist, curly hair brushed against my bare chest.
I opened my eyes slowly, hesitant as to what I might find. I smiled as my angel of mercy lay in my arms pushing furiously against me.
"Amazing". I muttered as she stared up at me, her brown eyes wide and fearful. "Calisile was right".
"Edward! You have to get back in the shadows! You have to move"! She rasped pushing against me with all her strength.
My hand raised brushing lightly against her cheek as she stared up at me questioningly. "I can't believe how quick it was. They're very good, I didn't feel a thing". I whispered as she continued to frantically push against me. At that moment, strange as it was I remembered a line from Romeo and Juliet. Perhaps death makes you delierious. "Death, that hath sucked they honey of thy breath, hath had no power upon thy beauty". I smiled breathing in her scent deeply. I forgot to memorize this, surely I would treasure it now that I was in hell. "You smell exactly the same as always. So maybe this is hell.. I don't care I'll take it."
Goodnight, hope that things work out all right.
"I'm not dead and neither are you! Please Edward you have to move! They can't be far away!" The angel screamed.
"What was that"? I whispered as she huffed.
"We're not dead, not yet! But we have to get out of here before the Volturi-"
Suddenly the realization hit me. I wasn't dead? Bella was here, ALIVE? She was here in my arms fighting me from my self inflicted demise? The Volturi were after me and now SHE was in danger as well! I snatched her up in my arms spinning around, pressing her against the wall. No one was going to take my angel now! Not after I just got her back, they would have to tear me to pieces before they did that!
My eyes scanned the alley, finding my enemy I composed myself. "Greetings Gentlemen". I said politely. "I don't think we will be requiring your services today. I would appreciate it very much, however if you would send my thanks to your masters."
"Shall we take this conversation to a more appropriate venue"?
"I don't believe that will be necessary". I almost hissed as the man remained smug. "I know your instructions Felix, I haven't broken any of the rules".
"Felix merely meant to point out the proximity of the sun. Let us seek better cover".
"I'll be right behind you". I muttered slowly. I knew these men could not be trusted no matter how polite they acted. "Bella why don't you go back to the square and enjoy the festival"?
"No, bring the girl".
"I don't think so". I said, these men were certainly testing my self restraint. I flexed myself, ready to attack if necessary.
"No". Bella said feafully behind me.
"Shh". I whispered to her, my eyes still on Felix and Demetri.
"Felix". Demetri said. "Not here." He turned smoothly toward me. "Aro would simply like to speak with you again, if you have decided not to force our hand after all".
"Certainly. But the girl goes free". I would not endanger my angel further by playing thier games.
"I am afraid that is not possible. We do have rulse to obey".
"Then I am afraid that I'll be unable to accept Aro's invitation. Demetri". I kept myself from hissing the words. No point in a fight, unless they were going to hurt Bella.
"That's just fine". Felix said smoothly.
"Aro will be disappointed". Demetri sighed.
These two were very much tempting fate by playing games with me, I surely could not take this witless banter much longer. I wanted to be with my Bella. If it were true that we were in fact alive I needed every fleeting second.
"I'm sure he'll survive the let down". I tensed as they spread out in front of the mouth of the alley, prepped for attack. I tensed every muscle in my body. I spun around as Alice appeared on the opposite side.
"Let's behave ourselves shall we?" She said lightly. "There are ladies present".
She hurried to my side and I was never so happy to see my little pixie. If nothing else she would save Bella when I took down the two guards.
"We're not alone". Alice whispered and I knew she was right.
"Please Edward let's be reasonable". Demetri said to me shaking his head.
"Let's." I whispered meeting his gaze. "And we'll leave quietly no, with no one the wiser."
"Enough". Jane's voice echoed from the dark.
I turned to face her slowly, my body still between her and Bella, keeping her against the wall. Now things were going to get complicated. I had to do this as calmly as possible, lest disaster erupts. I would not endanger Bella.
No.. Never again..
Edward stood in front of Rosalie, Carlisle and Esme waiting anxiously in the background to break up the impending fight.
Jasper and Alice entered the room, Jasper cringing slightly as he looked knowingly at the two fuming vampires. Anger, rage and jealousy was swirling from Rosalie. Edward was a tornado of pure rage and frustration. He glanced anxiously at his mate, Alice's hand patting his side comfortingly. He looked up at Esme and Carlisle as they shook their heads wearily.
"Are you retarded?! You're going to bring her here"!? Rosalie screamed, her arms folding tightly over her chest.
"Oh I'm sorry, did I have to run my plans past princess Rosalie"?! Edward shot back, his eyes narrowing. "You aren't in charge here. Carlisle said it's fine and if you don't like it then too damn bad! Leave if you want, I don't care"!
Esme raised her hand, about to intervene, Carlisle's hand resting on her shoulder. She looked back at him weakly as he shook his head. She sighed. It was never easy watching her serrogate children fighting.
"You're risking everything! You are such an idiot I swear! What if something happens"!? She screamed, her blonde hair flowing freely. "And this is my home as well and I'm not about to leave so you can bring your new human toy around.." She hissed coldly. "You're not human, and pretending to be is just comical. She doesn't belong here. You don't belong with her".
Emmett swooped into the room, brushing past Jasper with raised hands. "Alright cool it everyone." He said with a chuckle. "I'm sure you're going to give Jasper here an anxiety attack with all this craziness". He said smirking back over his shoulder."Rose". he muttered reaching out to her. She snapped her hand back, the fire in her eyes burning wildly as she looked at Edward.
"I'm not finished". She growled as Edward clenched his fists.
"Oh. You want to continue do you? Well guess what? You're opinion doesn't matter, she's coming"! Edward screamed into her face, Esme whimpered from the sidelines.
"Over my dead body, Edward". Rosalie hissed, her nose nearly brushing Edwards as they glared each other down.
Alice cringed, her eyes flicking toward Jasper. Jasper nodded, sending a wave of calm over the room. Floating behind Edward, he placed his hand firmly on his shoulder. "Come on. It isn't worth a fight". He whispered as Edward shook his head.
"No. Rosalie why don't you be real for a moment? Tell us all the real reason you don't like Bella". He growled as Rosalie's fist raised.
Emmett flashed behind his mate, his hands wrapping tightly around her arms. "Babe don't". he whispered as she clenched her teeth together.
"You are the most infuriating person on this earth"! She lunged at Edward, Emmett's hands remaining firmly closed on her arms.
Esme glanced at Carlisle as he pulled her against him.
"Let them work it out". He whispered quickly as she nodded hesitantly.
"You are a complete moron! I am so sick of every word that comes out of your mouth!" Rosalie screamed, her face inches from Edward's.
"Great!" He screamed back. "Then the feeling is mutual! You are the most self absorbed, condescending, hypocritical little bitch in the world"! He leaned forward, Rosalie's hand flying toward him.
"Whoa whoa.. Easy babe". Emmett flashed in between them, his large hand catching Rosalie's fist effortlessly.
"Step aside Emmett". She muttered, her eyes directed over his broad shoulders at Edward. "I'm going to kill him! Claw that smirk right off his stupid face"! She screamed, Emmett looking down at her patiently. She lunged at Edward, Emmett's arm catching her small waist. He hauled her onto his shoulder, walking confidently toward the window.
"Let me go Emmett"! She yelled, her fist thudding against the back of his head.
"Not until you cool down". He climbed onto the pane, his eyes turning toward Esme and Carlisle. "We will be back in a little bit". He smirked back at Edward. “Be good.” He chuckled, jumping toward the forest below.
As they landed, Rosalie pushed roughly against his iron chest, Emmett lowering her to the ground. She glared up at him, her gold eyes smoldering with rage.
“Babe.” He began as she turned away, darting into the trees.
Emmett folded his arms, his eyes turning toward the sky. “One. Two. Three..” He sighed, his eyes shutting smoothly. “Four.. Five..” He waiting till five minutes passed before taking off after her onto the trail.
He thundered through the trees, his senses trained on his fuming mate. He smirked, turning sharply north. Sprinting toward the coast line, he saw her sitting with her back toward him. He stopped a few feet away, his hands sliding into his pockets.
He saw her tense, her blonde hair blowing into the air as the wind howled up the cliffside.
Saying nothing, he knelt behind her, his large arms wrapping tightly around her thin frame. He felt her heavy breathes and heard the grinding of her teeth. He pulled her into him, his legs spreading around her waist as he sat down. Rosalie continued to breathe roughly, her body rigid in his arms. He waited a few moments, her body finally loosening in his grasp.
She let out a sigh, her slender hand touching lightly against his knuckles.
Remember those walls I built?
Well baby they're tumbling down.
And they didn’t even put up a fight,
They didn’t even make a sound.
“Rose”. He muttered his jaw pressing into the back of her head. His lips brushed across her blonde stands, her scent flowing down his throat. A hunger awoke in him, different than his thirst for blood, yet still as strong. He curled his fingers around her hand.
She remained silent, her body melting against him. Her anger evaporated, like water falling on a hot stove, turning into steam and floating away toward the sky. She stared intently toward the sea, her hair falling over her eyes.
He tilted his head, resting his chin in the nape of her neck. He sighed, his chest brushing against her back. “I know you’re worried”. He whispered, his thumb brushing over the thin bones in her hand. “But he wouldn’t bring her around if he weren’t sure of himself, and us. I know he will not let our family be implicated and if it comes down to it, he will choose us over her.”
His eyes ticked up toward her face, stoic and perfect, like a porcelain doll. He traced his fingers along her jaw, pulling her face toward him. He looked into her eyes as she still did not speak, her lips pursed in an impossibly tight line. Smiling lightly, he watched the corners of her lips turn up unwillingly.
I found a way to let you in,
But I never really had a doubt.
Standing in the light of your halo,
I got my angel now.
She sighed, her eyes turning toward the ground. “He shouldn’t even bother with her. She isn’t like us”.
“If the fact that she has a pulse is any indication,” He laughed as she fell silent.
She looked up at him, her long lashes brushing over her cheeks as she blinked. “She will be hurt. Immortals and mortals cannot share a life. She will age, and die, and he will live on.” She shook her head. “It’s so stupid. If he wanted a mate he should have chose a vampire. What could he possibly see in her? It’s not as if they can be intimate, she’s too fragile.”
Emmett laughed his throat vibrating as he tilted his head back. “You’re concerned with our brother’s sex life? I am so telling him”!
“I’m serious Em!” She shouted, her eyebrows furrowing. “It isn’t just that, they can’t be together! The only way they could is if she were a vampire. And you know he isn’t about to do anything like that, so what’s the point? He’s gambling with our family’s security for something pointless!”
It’s like I’ve been awakened,
Every rule I had you breaking.
It’s the risk that I’m taking,
I ain't never gonna shut you out.
“Maybe it isn’t so pointless to him Rose. Maybe he really cares for her. I mean look at him”. He said softly as Rosalie rolled her eyes and looked away. “I mean, I’ve never seen him so happy, he’s never been this way . And do you really want him to go back to the way he was before?All mopey and stuff?”
Rosalie sighed, her bottom lip pushing out as she frowned.
He chuckled, his head shaking back and forth. “Jasper says it’s kind of sick. He said he’s always switching from lust, to admiration, to longing, every time she’s around. He’s totally whipped, it’s pretty hilarious.”
Rosalie shook her head. “It won’t be so hilarious if he kills her or one of us do it”.
Emmett smiled his hand tracing down her waist. “Come on Rose. Let him have his happiness.. Even if it’s only for a short time, just let him be”.
She glanced back at him, her head leaning against his neck as she looked at the sky. “You’re such an optimist”. She muttered as he smirked.
“Alice has kind of rubbed off on me. Not to mention when Jasper is always screwing with our emotions, it’s hard to stay angry about anything. And why wouldn’t I be optimistic? I found you after all and if Edward feels the same thing for Bella I know it’ll work out.”
She smiled her smile genuine for the first time all day.
Everywhere I’m looking now,
I’m surrounded by your embrace.
Baby I can see your halo,
You know you’re my saving grace.
You’re everything I need and more,
It’s written all over your face.
Baby I can feel your halo,
Pray it won’t fade away.
She traced her fingers, down his chest, her eyes dancing over his face.
“That’s my Rose”. He whispered as she smirked.
He took her hand firmly in his, his forehead brushing against hers. They breathed in unison, they were two pieces of the same whole. Though they had their moments sometimes, nothing kept them angry at each other for very long. He looked at her, his smile growing as she fell silent. “Are you thinking again?”
She shook her head, her eyes turning toward the sea.
Emmett’s fingers ran into her hairline, brushing her soft hair from her eyes.
I can feel your halo.
“Kiss me”. He muttered as she turned back to him smirking.
“What”? She said, her head tilting toward the side.
“You owe me”. He muttered as she leaned away from him.
“For what”? She said with an eyebrow raised.
Emmett frowned, his finger raising and pressing against the back of his neck. “You punched me, I think I have a bruise forming back there”. He smirked as Rosalie shook her head.
“Oh waaahh.. You shouldn’t have interfered”. She teased as she folded her arms.
“I had to.” He said pulling her close again. “You woulda hurt my sparring partner. And what then?” He pursed his lips. “You owe me..”
Rosalie smiled, her hand floating over his chest as she looked down. She looked up as his hand wrapped around her back of her neck, his fingers stroking her skin.
Hit me like a ray of sun,
Burning through my darkest night.
You’re the only one that I want.
Think I’m addicted to your light.
I swore I’d never fall again,
But this don’t even feel like falling.
Gravity can’t forget.
So pull me back to the ground again.
She laughed, her lips leaning toward his.
He snapped his head back suddenly, a frown appearing on his boyish face. “Rose”. He muttered as she stared at him questioningly. “I was just joking. Don’t feel like you have to.” He said, his thumb brushing over her cheek.
She smiled, her eyes facing away. “Very well then, if you don’t want me to”. She whispered, resting her arms on her knees. She smirked, Emmett’s arm tugging on her waist and pulling her onto his waist.
“I didn’t say I didn’t want to. Only do it if you want to”. He smiled, resting his chin on her shoulder.
“I didn’t say I didn’t want to. You assumed”. She smirked as his head flew up. She smiled as his lips pressed firmly against hers, his hands clenching tightly to her back.
Feels like I’ve been awakened,
Every rule I had you breaking.
The risk that I’m taking,
I’m never gonna shut you out.
Everywhere I’m looking now,
I’m surrounded by your embrace.
Baby I can see your halo,
She laughed, her legs snaking around his waist as she leaned into him. His body shifted, pushing her backward onto the ground as their tongues danced eagerly in each other’s mouths.
Emmett leaned back, his weight balanced on his arms over her small body. He smirked, his fingers running through her hair. “You're troublesome. Always teasing.” He muttered lazily as she smiled, her arms circling his thick neck.
She looked up at him silently, her smile fading slightly. “I suppose Esme would want to feed her”.
“Rose”. Emmett said sternly shaking his head.
“I didn’t mean anything by it. Just assuming what we’ll be going home to”.
“We don’t have to go home. No one would be upset if we skipped out.” He whispered, leaning backward, his fingers weaving in hers, pulling her into a sitting position.
She frowned, shaking her head. “Esme would. She’d say his whole family should be there to support him”. She sighed.
“It’ll be fine”. He whispered pulling her into his arms.
Rosalie closed her eyes, her face leaning against his chest. “Well let’s get going then”. She muttered half heartedly as he smiled.
He glided to his feet, pulling her with him as he stood. They started walking toward the forest, Emmett’s hand clenching hers tightly as she leaned against his side.
You know you’re my saving grace.
You’re everything I need and more,
It’s written all over your face.
Baby I can feel your halo,
Pray it won’t fade away. I can feel your halo.
They strode into the forest, Emmett draping his arm over her shoulders. He smirked as Alice and Jasper came into view, Alice grinning at them excitedly.
“Don’t think you two can skip out on this! If I gotta go then so do you!” He teased as they stopped, Alice taking Jasper’s hand.
“We’re not skipping”. She smiled, looking up at Jasper. “Just going to do a little hunting and kill some time”.
Emmett glanced at Jasper, smirking deviously. “I’m sure that’s all you guys are gonna do. Well try not to wreck the place”. He laughed as Alice stuck out her tongue.
“Thanks for the idea Emmett. We weren’t even thinking that until you mentioned it.” Jasper smirked as Emmett chuckled. Taking Alice’s hand, he grinned. “We’ll try to be back before the human gets there”. He muttered sprinting off with Alice at his side.
“Have fun”! Emmett called over his shoulder as Rosalie laughed.
Everywhere I’m looking now,
I’m surrounded by your embrace.
Baby I can see your halo,
You know you’re my saving grace.
You’re everything I need and more,
It’s written all over your face.
They neared the house, Rosalie’s face turning from that of contentment to grimace. Emmett smirked down at her, his arm pulling her against his chest.
Esme leaned out the window, her smile bright. “Can you two come help Carlsile and I? We’re making Italian for her”.
Rosalie growled, her eyes narrowing. Emmett laughed his hand waving toward Esme. “Yeah be right up”. He looked down at his mate, watching her frown deepen. “Italian.. Yum”. He laughed as she shook her head.
“Yum”. She muttered darkly as they glided up the porch.
Baby I can feel your halo.
Pray it won’t fade away.
Emmett spun suddenly, his lips crushing against hers as her frown melted away. She opened her eyes as his lips drew away, his smirk reappearing. “Be good love”. He whispered as she shrugged.
“No promises”. She smirked, taking his hand and floating into the house.
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